Slip [BoyxBoy]

Is This Going Where I Think It's Going?

"Ma," I sighed letting tears fall, "Dad, I don't want to do this without you," I threw my arm over my eyes, crying into my elbow until I couldn't anymore.

At some point I fell asleep and woke up to a still dark sky, but I had a blanket covering me. Did I have this when I came out?

"What happened last time you shut down?" I jumped and turned to find Jeffrey on the chair across from me. I sat up rubbing my eyes thinking I'm dreaming.

"Uh," I intelligently started, "I ended in the slammer," I joked.

Noticing his glare I quickly started to explain, " Not the jail slammer, but another kinda jail. I kinda hoped you couldn't hear us in the kitchen, but basically I was in the hospital for a month. Last time I shut down I wound up there and yeah," I concluded not wanting to elaborate.

"Oh," Jeffrey let it go, thankfully. "I'm really sorry all this shitty crap happens to you," he sat up to sit next to me. Totally not weird. At all.

"I mean, the accident," he pointed to my leg when I frowned, "dealing with me," he pointed at his face drawing my attention to his lips, which I tried to not imagine working on me, "and now this," he motioned at the house.

"Oh. Well everything turns out well one way or another, and when people help, it's easier. But thank you though for the concern." I smiled, internally agreeing with him because in the end, all I can remember is the way things are before they turn out well enough. If I said that, the flimsy amount of pride I have would disappear instantly. But the hardest thing to digest was that, before today, I didn't think that Jeffrey Vincent would ever be so considerate towards me. Me, The Royal Gayness, me the fag that angered him so much.

He looked at me like he used to before he would slam my locker scaring me in the hallways. And at this moment he is slightly scaring me again. I gave him a weak laugh, hoping he wouldn't do anything. He let out a frustrated growl and slammed his fist on the pillow in between us making me jump.

"Why can't you show another emotion other than that fake smile?" he leaned towards me, as I leaned away. "All through highschool you did this too. Always smiling. Even when I-" his breath hitched, "When I would torment you. You would just look at me," he cupped my face, "and smiled. Why?" I got the feeling that he no longer was talking to me.

"I'm sorry?" I decided to play it safe.

"Stop apologizing for something you didn't do," he leaned in closer, his forehead barely touching mine.

"Okay," Was the next intelligent thing I said. He dropped his hands, much to my dismay, and leaned back, making me miss his warmth too.

He smiled and then shook his head before leaning back towards me, engulfing me in a fierce embrace.

"You can cry. You can shout. Dammit Michael, you can curse at me. You can even hit me," he hugged me tighter, his warm breath grazing my neck sending shivers down my spine, "Just stop forcing yourself to smile, please." Jeffrey begged.

I don't know if it was the sentiment in his words, or the warmth of his body, or if it was both but, my sight became blurry and soon, warm liquid was dropping on Jeffrey's shoulder. I tightened my grip on his shirt and cried. Snot and all, I cried on Jeffrey Vincent who held me and kept murmuring reassuring words. I cried until I fell asleep again, not once feeling cold.

Maybe it was my imagination but I thought I felt a quick kiss on my neck followed by, "I'd do anything to make you smile again."