A Righteous Love

Chapter Thirty-Five - I Don't Need Your Pity

I wasn't slipping into that dark place again, it was just the aftermath of it all – my endless mood swings, random outbursts, crying and such. But it was getting better with each day and I was starting to wake up some mornings with a smile on my face. It was definitely weird, but I was getting used to it. I was beginning to really like it. 

Justin and I walked into school together as the day got started, and it dragged on like any other normal Tuesday. My normal classes with my normal friends, and normal work with my normal teachers. Everything was just normal.

And then I got to lunch.

I suddenly felt all eyes on me as I walked into the cafeteria with Ashley next to me. The rest of our friends were already sitting at our table and I had no idea what was happening, but it was never like this before. I had never walked into a room and noticed that everyone was staring at me. 

I didn't like it one bit.

"What's going on?" I mumbled to Ashley, folding my arms across my chest. It dawned on me that my hair was up in a bun on the top of my head, and I almost smacked myself for it right then. I only wish I had my hair to hide under.

"You haven't noticed?" She crinkled her forehead in return.

"Noticed what?" I whispered, easily just as confused at her. We slowed up our walking as we approached our table and sat down next to each other, joining our friend group.

"It's been going around," she said in a low voice, glancing around us as I still felt some eyes burning through me.

"What?" I pressed.

It only took one look from Ashley to know exactly what she was talking about.

My secret.

"You're kidding," I nearly lost my breath. She shook her head and looked at me with sympathy, and I could tell she didn't really know what to say.

"I don't know who started talking about it, but all of a sudden it's been spreading around school. I doubt everyone knows the truth – they hear it through people who get the story wrong. And now they probably all think that you have an STD and are addicted to heroin or something," she twirled her blonde locks around her finger, brushing the subject off lightly and trying to get me to ease up.

"Yeah, probably," I sighed heavily. "Whatever."

I turned to face the rest of the table and took out my lunch, dumping out what was inside the bag and eating whatever I could before I lost my appetite.

I think my friends were a bit shocked at how I took the situation, but what was I supposed to do? People were going to think what they wanted, and I couldn't stop them. The most important people in my life knew the truth and that was what mattered most.

Half an hour later, I was walking to sixth period and stopped by the bathroom before I went to class. Fixing my bun in the mirror at the sinks, as luck would have it, in walked Lacey. 

"Hey," she greeted me, walking up to the mirror as well and looking at her reflection. Her golden blonde hair shimmered under the fluorescent lighting of the bathroom, swaying with every small movement of her head. 

It took me a moment to find my voice as I cleared my throat. "Hi," I said it more like a question. 

I didn't realize I was on the level of friendship with her that we could speak. All I kept thinking was she came in here to try and steal someone away from me. Again. 

"So, um, I wanted to talk to you about something," she suddenly turned to me and put her hand on her small hip.

"Yeah?" I said slowly, raising my eyebrows and glancing at her for a moment. My heart rate picked up at that, thinking that this could only mean something bad.