Fifty Shades Freed

13

"So should we or shouldn't we....?"

Niall looked up at Harry as he asked the question and Harry chose to sit down. They ate breakfast and Harry almost hadn't slept during the night.

"I don't know!"

Harry's reply got Nialls eyes to becoming sad. He looked down at the food again and he almost poked around in the flakes. Harry swallowed. He sensed just what Niall thought now. Therefore, he leaned back in his chair and took a deep breath

"It's my sister we're talking about."

Niall nodded a little bit.

"I just asked general. Should we continue, although it wont be your sister?"

Harry gulped and he clenched his jaw. He felt doubt about it all again and he was afraid.

"Yes?"

Niall looked up at him.

"You're lying,"

Harry looked into the blue eyes. He saw at Niall that this was a big disappointment. Niall didn't understand, and Harry didn't want to.

"We..." Harry frowned. "Niall, you know I..." He become silent. The Irishman nodded a little bit.

"Yes, I heard about your opinion yesterday and I understand you, but I really want to go forward with this, and for me it's important."

Harry nodded, and he looked down at the table again.

"I have said what I feel right now, I have never seen myself as a father, a role model, or as a man with wise decisions." he got up. "Give me time to land where you are."

Niall snorted.

"Give your time?" he got up. "One year, five years, ten years?"

Harry shook his head.

"No, just some time!"

Niall dropped the spoon and he stood up. He looked tired and sad at Harry.

"I go to my parents for a few days. I also need to think."

Harry swallowed.

"So you are escaping from the problem?"

Niall snorted.

"The problem?" he got up. "No, we need time to think, and when I come back home I want you to say yes or no and I mean that the answer must be for good."

Harry just stared at him. Did he seriously meant that? Niall left the table and Harry heard that he went up to the bedroom. Niall wanted to have a yes or a no? Harry looked down on the chair, which Niall had been sitting on. Damn, this didn't go as planned. If Harry said no, then it was all over, but if he said yes, Niall would be happy?

----

Niall was just tired. He didn't want to go away, but at the same time, he needed distance to everything. It was like so many pieces fell into place, but Harry wasn't involved at all. Niall knew that Harry would get children, if Niall went on like this, just for Nialls sake. Harry would also ensure to be a good father, or at least a person who attended occasionally. Niall would be the one who was given the responsibility over the child and somehow did Niall accepted that life. Maybe it was like that it was in an ordinary family? One took care of the children and the other worked? Niall remember how he had been home and been  waited for his own father and how his mother did everything in the house. Niall and Harry would be such parents and Niall wasn't sure he wanted that.

Niall took the suitcase to the hall and he took on his shoes. Harry appeared b the door and Niall saw that he suffered, but it was too late to feel guilty now.

"Are you sure about this?" he mumbled. Niall looked up at him and nodded. Yes, Niall needed to get away from there and that now.

"Yes, and if you want something, you can still call me. I'm not angry, I just want to think through what I want."

Harry nodded a little bit.

"And I should think through what I want?"

Niall nodded.

"Although I know that you already are against children, maybe you should think about us. This is not about you or about our sex life. This is about the future, Harry."

----

Harry was sad throughout the body and it felt like the last time when Niall left him, but this time it was over that Harry refused to give a clear answer. He understood why Niall wanted to think through this. Perhaps Niall chose to have children by his own, without Harry? Niall might want to go ahead and not be with harry anymore? Yes, there were no thoughts over about what Harry wanted to do in the future, instead, he saw what he didn't want to happen.

----

Harry slipped into the pub and he did everything as he wasn't used to do. Niall had been away from him for a whole day and now it was a painful feeling inside. He slid onto the chair at the bar and he ordered a large beer. He wanted something stronger, but at the same time he was aware that it would be wrong to totally derail. He tasted the drink and he took a deep breath. Maybe it was better if he let Niall vanish away? In this way they could both get what they wanted? Harry could find a lover who wanted to be beaten, and Niall could find a man who wanted to have children, but that was what the problem was. Harry didn't want to meet a new man and he didn't want to see Niall with someone else. He moaned and he emptied the glass. Life sucked!

"Alone?"

Harry looked up. Directly he saw a brown-eyed guy with a beard and a big smile.

"Depends on what you mean by alone."

The guy sat down next to him and he smiled awry, charming and almost excessively.

"I'm Liam."

Harry snorted.

"Fun for you."

Liam laughed a little and he drank from the drink as he had in the glass.

"So he left you?"

Harry responded immediately and looked up at the guy again.

"Do you see that?"

Liam nodded and he looked straight at him.

"Yes, you sit here and settle for beer. You have your back to everyone else and you are in a bubble. There are only two choices. One, you have financial problems or two, he left you."

Harry snorted.

"I might have problems with the economy?"

Liam shook his head quickly.

"No, you look to good to have those problems." he replied, as if he was trying to charm Harry. "So he left you or did you leave him?"

Harry chose to be honest.

"He hasn't left me, but he has gone home to his parents to think about our life."

Liam put his head askew.

"So he left you?"

Harry didn't like the truth. He didn't like to hear that Niall chose that path.

"No, he will return!" growled Harry quickly, and cold, and he showed his left hand with the rings. "He's mine, and he will turn up in the morning and miss me and want me and..." yes maybe it was just a dream?