Penitent - on hold

Chapter 4

''So... what now?'' I asked and gathered the courage to sit next to him. He didn't make any move to go away from me. Good.

''I have no fucking clue.'' He mutters, ''You... You're my best friend. How can you be my mate?!''

''I don't know, Zach. It wasn't my choice.''

We both knew that you can't change your mate with someone else, neither you can destroy the mate bond. It can only weaken, but weakening our bond meant weakening the bond Zach and I have been building for so long now. I didn't want that to happen.Iithink I wanted to try. I was willing to do anything if it meant I'm not losing him.

I'm not going to let myself lose the only person I love more than any of those people out there.

''Look at me,'' I said out loud. He perked up for a second like he was expecting my soothing words to come out and wait for them to solve all of our problems. This time, it wasn't like that and he knew that well.

Once our eyes looked at each other, we felt the bond, the mate-pull, the connection we've never felt before. Out inner wolves hungry for each other, for their soul mates, for their only ones. Except, we were exactly the one's who were stopping everything, when we wanted nothing more but to feel each other in the most magnificent way.

''This is killing me.'' He groaned, ''I feel like... like I want to kiss you. Really bad.''

My mind was telling me that it was wrong, that it is only going to ruin everything my friend and I had. But my heart was stronger and it wanted only one thing I've never expected to get. A kiss.

''Then kiss me.'' My voice was barely above the whisper and I could see hesitation hidden behind those dark eyes of his. But deep down, the pulling was killing him and he needed that kiss as much as I did. 

Quickly, he pulled me towards him and just as I managed to shutter my eyes closed, our lips collided in one beautiful sync. His plump lips were surprisingly very tender, as they perfectly moved against my smaller ones. His right hand gently squeezed the side of my waist, whilst I let both of mines to tangle around his neck. I got lost in this moment, right then and there. My mind stopped working and my heart, getting what it wanted, was beating so fast I thought it'd explode. I felt things I've never felt before and never did it felt so good to kiss with any other guy. 

I breathed his name out, as he gently laid me down on my soft mattress, while continuing with giving me those blissful kisses because they indeed made me happy. But... if this actually made me feel the way I probably shouldn't feel, does that mean I... like Zach?

What if the mate bond just made me realized I really liked my best friend?

The moment of pure bliss turned into the moment of sadness, as he pulled away from me, breathing heavily and uneven - just like me. I thought it might have been because he needed to catch a breath, but I stopped breathing right when he kissed me.

''I-I can't.'' He managed to say, ''This is wrong.''

What? 

''Zach-''

''No...'' Like he was disgusted with himself or maybe even me, he stood up and moved his light brown hair away from his face, looking everywhere but me, ''Fuck.''

Inside of my chest appeared a very rare feeling of being hurt, really hurt. I tried to assure myself that he just doesn't know what to think right now, that he's going through some kind of shock, that eventually he will come around. But I needed him now. I needed my best friend. Or mate. I didn't even know how to call him anymore.

''Zach,'' I pleaded him. The tone of my voice was recognizable to him - whenever I needed him the most, he'd know it right away. What's most important, he was there. He didn't hesitate sitting down next to me and to pull me in one of those big hugs of his, as a reminder that I'm not alone in this.

It was different this time. I could see by the look on his face.

He was battling with himself, his own mix of emotions. With glassy eyes, he decided to give up and finally look me in the eyes and whisper, ''I'm sorry.''

Faster than the light, he was out of the room, slamming it behind himself. It felt like a slap to my face, as the realization slowly crept to me. 

I was left alone.

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Veryyyy short chapter and I do apologize, but the next one is going to be longer, I promise!

I just want to point out how I'd be extremely happy to see more votes and comments because that makes me update faster and well... makes me happier. Also, if you've seen any grammar mistakes,feel free to point them out! 

How do you like this story so far (if you like it, of course)? Love you all,

xoxo