Give Me Some Of That Bass // phan

Miracle Mile

"I know that there have been some slight...complications, as of late," Chris continued, filling the profound silence gratefully, "but we are still Heinous, and we need to find a health and effective way to deal with them. Come on, we're still friends, guys."

But lately, their definition of friendship had begun to fade around the edges.

Keeping secrets and stabbing each other in the back, that wasn't something friends would do, and yeah, Phil felt guilty as hell for all the shit he'd said to them, and he would like nothing more than to try and resolve it, but how? He couldn't tear them apart and try and fix it with duct tape, there were no magic words that could take it all back. They would always have these moments in their life, and that was the worst part of it all; the scars it left behind.

"You morbid motherfuckers," Chris muttered, dragging a hand across his face roughly. "Okay, what I think we need is some bonding exercises. We can...try and bring out some of this tension, approach it and make it disappear."

"This is stupid," Elliot said. "Look, why don't we just play some songs, practice or whatever, I'm sure that's more important."

"Yeah, cause it's just that easy, right?" Chris shot back at him. "All of you, all of us, are way too fucked up right now to even begin cooperating, let alone play a decent chord together."

"And you think this will fix everything?" Grayson asked.

"I think it'll be a step closer in getting our heads out of our asses. Is that good enough for you?"

And he wasn't...well, he wasn't wrong, and as much as they all seemed to shy away from the idea, there was no denying that it wouldn't help.

"Good." Chris nodded to himself. "I'll start then. Phil?" He looked over at Phil with a determined look on his face, and took a deep breath. "I've always known about you and Dan."

"What?"

"Look, before you get mad," Chris said quickly, trying to reassure him, and it took all of his willpower not to snap at him. "I didn't tell you because I saw how happy he made you."

"And you thought not telling me would make it easier?" Phil asked in disbelief. "You don't know how fucking paranoid I was all the time, that you would find out and get angry, and shut me out. It would have been so much better, I...we wouldn't be in this mess if you had told me."

"I'm sorry," Chris said softly.

Phil shook his head and sighed heavily, burying his face in his hands. "Well, this is off to a great start," he muttered with a sarcastic laugh.

It went silent again, and Phil was starting to think they would just give up and try to work through it another way, when Grayson spoke up.

"I, um," he said, staring down at his knees and tangling his fingers together nervously. He seemed uncomfortable with all of them looking at him. "I just want to say I'm really glad I became friends with you guys. Even with all the shit we've caused lately. Before I..." He swallowed thickly. "Before I started singing with you guys, I wasn't a very confident person, and I wasn't open about myself. About liking guys. When I met you, it was...easy, so easy to say it out loud, I'd been so terrified before, that I would never be accepted because of it, but you didn't care and that was....that was good for me." He swiped a hand across his face and gave them a watery smile. "So thanks, I guess."