Love For an Assassin [Kili Fanfic]

Chapter Seventeen

"Uncle, no!"

Kili stepped in between me and Thorin, blocking him from hurting me.

"Just let her leave. If she's of no use to you, then why does it matter whether she leaves or not?" Kili demanded, but I could tell beneath his words that he was just as nervous as I was.

Thorin grabbed a fistful of my hair and yanked me closer, making me cry out softly. He withdrew a short blade and jammed in beneath my neck, "Because she's a filthy elf, Kili. Why do you care if I kill her or not? She was the one that took you back to that faithless woodland sprite!" Thorin shouted. And he was right. I had done some horrible things to Kili, so why didn't he hate me?

"That doesn't mean she deserves to die, Uncle!" Kili countered, "Just let her leave."

Thorin sneered, a quite atrocious sight on his face, and yanked once on my hair, "I don't think so."

"Thorin Oakenshield!" a voice boomed from below. We all turned to see the wizard dressed in grey robes step forward. "You are making a grave mistake," his voice rumbled, "Now let the elf go."

"Why should I listen to you, Gandalf the Grey, when you have brought nothing but peril and ruin upon me?" Thorin demanded angrily. He tightened his grip on my hair and I had to clench my teeth to keep from crying out. It felt like he would pull out a fistful of hair if he yanked any harder.

"Thorin, let her go." The wizard's voice was calm and collected, practically the opposite of Thorin's.

I turned to see Thorin snarl once before releasing my hair and shoving me forward, causing me to almost fall over the side. I gulped once before steadying myself and swinging around to face Thorin.

"Leave then!" he shouted. I glanced once at Kili who looked mournful, before climbing over the side and beginning to make my way down. I was truly stuck between a rock and a hard place. If I stayed with the dwarves, Thorin would kill me. If I went back to the elves, I would be rejected. I had no where to go.

As I got close to the bottom, I let go and dropped the rest of the way. I saw that everyone was looking at me, both from above and beside.

Feeling quite unwanted, I began limping away from everyone, trying my best to keep some of my dignity intact.

Then I felt a gentle hand on my shoulder and I turned, surprised. Gandalf, the wizard, stood in front of me, a small smile on his face. He looked friendly and somewhat regretful.

I stood still, waiting for him to speak, since he obviously had something to say to me.

"You don't have to leave, Ithildae."

My mouth practically dropped open and I stuttered, "H-How do you know my name?"

"That is not important. What is important is that you don't need to leave."

"But I have no reason to stay. Neither parties want me near," I muttered somewhat resentfully.

"I don't believe that is true, My lady," Gandalf winked and stepped aside to reveal the small hobbit standing a bit away. Realizing I could see him, he quickly approached me and smiled, "Don't go. I want you here, Ithildae." he said cheerfully.

I almost smiled at that, but I knew he was just trying to make me feel better. "I have to go, Bilbo."

Bilbo watched me quietly, not saying anything. He seemed to understand what I meant beneath my words and backed away, letting me decide.

"Goodbye," I whispered before turning my back on him and continuing away. It didn't take long before I was up and over a hill, and therefore, out of their sight.

Once I was alone again, I rested on a small boulder, trying to focus on my breathing. My chest and stomach were burning and I supposed that all the walking and climbing had done nothing to help me heal. Slowly but surely, the pain was increasing until it even hurt to breath.

I could tell something was wrong, but I didn't know what. I had never been particularly good or interested in healing, so I didn't have much hope for being able to fix whatever was wrong.

But it didn't matter, because I didn't really want to live anyway. I mean, what did I have to live for? Kili? He was in love with someone else and hadn't done a thing to stop me from leaving so he obviously didn't want me. The elves? They never really wanted me and King Thranduil only took me in so he could use me. I was utterly alone. And the truth was that I hated it.

It was selfish of me, but I wanted someone that would care for me. I wanted someone to say that I was worth something and I belonged somewhere. But I had given up on that dream a long time ago and didn't have any hope of it ever coming true.

Okay, that's not true. I did have hope that it would come true at one time, but not anymore. It pretty much slipped away when I first heard that Kili cared for someone else.

Sighing quietly, I raised myself up and locked my legs to keep from falling over. Step by step, I headed even further away from Kili. It was slow going, but I had to get away somehow.

Even as the pain in my chest and stomach spread to my whole body and I could feel myself slipping away, I kept going because I had to get away. I hoped that the farther I got from Kili, maybe the pain from my heart would ease. Maybe then, I could find a new life.

Hello my crazy readers! Why do I call you all crazy? Well, because if you are reading this then that means you have stuck with me and my ridiculous updates and that makes you crazy! Haha, just kidding! It makes you awesome for reals! And I am so grateful for all of you :) We are getting closer and closer to the end of this book! Crazy... I can't believe it.

But, it you liked it, as always I would love to know by a little vote, or comment :D

Ithildae