The Lucky One(Riley depression story)

Sad smiles

Riley Matthews was tired; she'd been tired for far too many years.

Hiding it with a wide smile and positive remarks, she'd managed to fool most of them into believing she was still the optimistic girl she had always been.

But Farkle Minkus knew better, simply because he knew her better than many gave him credit for. Having met the brunette beauty from the early age of seven, and having fallen for her on that very day, he'd picked up on the little things that made her Riley.

He noticed the way her nose would scrunch up when she was excited, and the way she preferred to eat macaroni with ketchup even if everyone else found it disgusting. He noticed how she had a habit of tucking her dark hair behind her ear when talking to someone she likes, and how she was startled by the sound of thunder even if she didn't like to admit it.

But he also noticed other things, like her different smiles. She had her happy smile, one she usually wore on a daily basis, her shy one, which she usually had on when talking to someone older than her, her mischievous smile, one that resembled Maya's way too much, and her sad smile, the one Farkle was seeing of more and more. He noticed how she tended to pick at her fingers a lot, and how her sleeves were becoming longer and longer.

He especially noticed that each time he would ask her about it, Riley would simply reply with ''I'm just tired''. And she looked so, with dark bags appearing under her eyes and the sluggish way she'd hold herself.

But he knew there was more to it; and he wasn't going to let her go on like that any longer.

''Riley, we have to talk'' he said, climbing through her bedroom window and hitting the wooden floor with a loud 'thud'.

Riley was lying on her bed, with a history book in front of her and two journals to the side. Her lips slightly tucked up into a grin, pushing her hair back from her face and sitting up from where she was. ''Oh hey, Farkle. What is it?''

''Riley, you know I care for you, right?'' he asked, sitting on the edge of her bed and facing her.

She hesitantly nodded her head, in clear confusion. ''What's going on, Farkle? Is something wrong?''

''I'm here to ask you the same thing'' he said, noticing how her face fell. ''I know there's something wrong''

''Farkle, I'm perfectly fine'' she said, grinning. But it wasn't a happy one; instead a forced and saddened one.

Farkle sighed, running his fingers through his dark hair. ''I know you, Riley, and I know when there's something wrong. Why don't you want to tell us?''

''I've been tired, that's all-''

''No, no its not!'' He cried out, much to her wide eyes. ''You're not tired, you're sad. What's going on?''

''Listen, Farkle, I've got a lot of homework to do'' she grabbed his shoulders, as they both arose to their feet. ''I think it's time you head back home''

That's when he grabbed her hands and pulled up the sleeves, only to find red marks completely invading her arms. Some of them looked recent, too, with some of them still bleeding a little. He'd had his suspicions, but looking at them right now, made his heart stop at that very moment out of concern, sorrow, and guilt.

Should he have said something earlier, maybe the cuts from today wouldn't have been there.

''Riley'' he looked up to find her eyes watering, as she rapidly pulled her arms away and pulled down the sleeves. He couldn't blame her; he himself was almost in tears just having the image burned into his mind. ''How can you do that to yourself?''

''It makes the pain go away,'' he heard her mumble, as she turned her head away from him.

''You're hurting yourself'' he grabbed her hands into his, holding onto them even tighter as she attempted to get lose. ''Don't you realize just how especial you are? You're Riley Matthews, a ray of sunshine!''

''No, not anymore!''She cried, finally freeing her hands. ''I haven't been that Riley in some time now, and honestly, I don't think I ever will be again''

She stepped closer to him, staring at him with those caramel eyes of hers. ''Farkle, you have to promise me you won't tell anyone''

''I have to! I don't want you to keep hurting yourself!"

''I promise I'll stop, but please don't tell anyone! Mom and Dad are too busy for this, and I don't want to bother Maya and the rest''

Farkle cupped her face into his hands, gulping the urge to cry. ''Riley, you're not bothering us. We care about you, I care about you, and I can't go on knowing you're doing this to yourself!''

''Nobody cares what I'm doing!'' she yelled, and Farkle felt himself grow even more tense seeing the tears that fell from her eyes. ''I'm a nobody! Please, just don't do this!''

He took a deep breath, and pulled her in as tightly as he could. She broke down even more, crying into his shoulder and clinging onto him like her life depended on it. That's when he literally felt his heart shatter, hearing her pained cries.

How was he supposed to keep himself together when the girl he'd loved for as long as he could remember was harming herself? How was he supposed to go to school tomorrow and look her in the eye and not cry just thinking about her holding a knife to her wrists?

He didn't want to see her hurt herself because heaven knows it's a thousand times harder on him just knowing she wasn't okay.

He had to do something; he just had to.

''Riley, you need help'' he murmured, running his fingers gently through her hair.

She sniffed, pulling away and shaking her head violently. ''Farkle, I'll be okay, just please don't tell anyone. I promise I won't do it again!''

''But what if you do? What if next time you cut yourself too deep and you bleed out? I don't want to live in a world without you'' he said, wiping her tears away with his thumb.

She forced a smile. ''Farkle, I promise that if I do it again, you can tell them. Just not today, please''

Farkle wanted to say no to her, to remind her that it was something too serious to keep quiet about, but as she looked up with those round eyes full of tears, he knew he couldn't. It was obvious he'd caused a reaction out of her, and it was better if she took the time to calm down, seeing as it could lead to her wanting to cut herself even more.

He sighed, closing his eyes shut for a few seconds. ''Fine, but eventually I will tell them''

Riley wasted no time pulling him into a tight embrace again, kissing his cheek. ''Thank you, Farkle! Thank you so much!''

''What is it that's making you do this to yourself, though?'' he asked, pulling away. ''There has to be a reason''

''Let's not talk about it right now''

''Riley, I have to know. Nothing's going to change as long as you remain silent''

''I'll tell you tomorrow, okay?'' she smiled, grabbing the books on her bed and putting them on top of her drawer. ''What do you say, Farkle? Want to watch a movie?''

He blinked at how fast her mood had switched. ''Yeah, sure''

He watched as she grabbed her laptop and opened it, then nodded her head towards all the movies she had on her other drawer. ''What movie do you want to watch?''

He grabbed The breakfast Club, knowing it was her favorite and handed it to her. He laid down on her bed as she followed, placing in the CD.

She turned to look at him, their faces only inches apart. ''Thank you for staying''

He sent her a small smile, taking a deep breath. ''Friends are there for friends always''

''I know,'' she said, as the movie began playing.

Watching as she snuggled closer to him with a few more tears trickling down her cheeks, he sighed.

Riley Matthews was depressed, and he was more than determined to fix that.