For some reason,I want to create a video,not a commentary video,but video to fill this void of an desert.Video that is part of my disappearance.Yes,I'm happy with my three subs,dickhead.I talking about my suicide.The two attempts I did.Part of me said in doing it for my self.Now,I'm not the kind of guy who wants attention,and why should it bother me when I have face my demons.I think yes,it is for attention,but that not right and I know it is.I wanted to help people so long which is why part of me wanted to do music.Not to be scare anymore?I really don't have a question for my answer.I see people post it,and I ask my self why.What do you gain?is it self confidence?Maybe that is my reason why.My deep wound makes me strong.Is that true?Do I want to say that.I think I'm scared,I don't have the confidence to do it.Is it more personal?Can't find my reasons anymore.I love do this it help me function throughout the day.It's small,I know,but I'll grow larger,abundant,and wisely.
4:50 Am 04/16/16
