Internal| H.S.

{0.4}

4.5.15

Its been a few weeks since I was released from the hospital and started testing, but they still haven't figured out whats wrong with me.

     After a lot of convincing and promises made, my brother was able to get me to do the testing.

    I honestly hope my mother never finds out. Not that I care what she thinks, but the consequences... are unspeakable. I refuse to go through that again. My mind wanders back to the day it started...

(Flashback)

9 years ago.

     "Aubrey, sweetie, come down here!" My mom ordered sweetly. I put my dolls down, stand up and smooth my dress before getting up. I can't have any dust on me or crinkles in my dress because then she'll know I was playing on the ground!

    As I make my way to the bottom step, I see my mom and father waiting for me. My dad staring at my mother intensely, his jaw clenching in and out, while my mom on the other hand smiles at me nervously. Once I'm in her reach, she grabs my arm and rubs my head roughly.

    "Sweetie, you know your father and I love you right?" She ask quietly. I nod, "And you love your father right?" I nod once more.

     "Would you do anything to keep him happy?" She asks, I nod. Where is she going with this?

     "Okay sweetie, we'll need you to do something for us whenever daddy ask." She begins, but then my father cuts her off by yanking me towards him. I'm nervous, whats going on? I could feel my neck starting to perspire and my breathing increased a little. Whats going on?

    My father starts to take me downstairs as my mom yells at him to retreat, "Wait William! We have to discuss this with her! She won't understand this way, get back here!" My heartbeat increases, I'm scared.

      "Shut up woman and just cook! I know what I'm doing." My father yells back in response. I don't like this! I want Paxter.

     "PAXTER! PAXTER!" I scream as daddy squeezes my arm tighter.

     "Shut up you harlot!" My dad hisses at me, covering my mouth. His finger nails claw into my face and tears start to trickle down my face. Why is he doing this? Why is he being so mean to me and mommy?

     He tugs on my arm with his other hand and smacks me across with the face. My breath hitched and my body froze over. I knew my life was about to change
    

     Little did I know... that was only the beginning

(End of flashback)

     I didn't realize I was crying until I felt cold tears drop onto my legs. I quickly wipe them away and get out of my car. I make my way into the shops and pocket my cell-phone into my back pocket.

    I won't ever cry over them again. It is in the past and I can never think about that again, but speaking of my parents... I need to find someone to go with me to my sisters dinner my father is throwing for her. Not to sure as to  why I'm bothering to go.

I make my way into Barnes & Noble, Co. Books are my weakness if you couldn't already tell. Its like my weed, makes me forget about the world for awhile and they always leave me on a high after. Its amazing.

I head to the young adult section and my heart flutters with joy. It always feel as if I landed in heaven when I get to this section. I settle with five books because, well, I'm not Donald Trump. Trust me though, if I were him I can promise you I'd buy all the books in the world.