Love Me At My Worst (Kylo Ren X Reader)

Chapter 1. An Officer

It wasn't like you were scared of Kylo Ren.

He was just a man wasn't he?

Okay. Maybe you were a little scared of him.

Your back was pressed against the wall and your hands tight against your side. Sweat poured down your face from the fear radiating off your body, and of course the heat of the lightsaber. You watched in dismay as Kylo Ren swung his lightsaber wildly into a control panel. With each strike the loud smashes echoed through the room. Your once pristine work station was now turning into a decomposing pile of wires and rubble. You looked past the angry sith at Officer Saw who was in the same position your were, pressed against the wall trying to put as much distance between herself and the deadly weapon. Your eyes met hers and you both shared a look of fear. Many officers of the First Order had been killed by "accident" in one of Kylo's fits of rage. You were definitely closer to the destruction than she was though. You could feel the lightsaber whipping in front of you and your skin sizzled with the close proximity. You tried to concentrate on Kylo Ren's mask, willing him to give up.

Please. Please stop. Please don't hurt me.

Finally, the entrance opened and your superior officer ran in.

"Ren, stop this madness!" General Hux screamed and you flinched as The Knight's saber whirled around when he turned to face the General. "Go! Leader Snoke has requested to see you!" The lightsaber was deactivated with a angry huff and Ren left quickly. The General ran forward to you and held your side. Your legs were wobbly and you felt sick to your stomach. Officer Saw ran to you too.

"(Y/N) Are you okay!?" you nodded weakly in response. "He was so close to you! I thought for sure you were going to be the next Ren-Kebab." The General gave you both a look of concern.

"I apologize for this Officers. Ren is extremely volatile as you must know." You both nodded to him and he led you both to the med bay.

"General, we don't need medical assistance." You protested and he shook his head.

"Just let them check you over. You both can have a few days off to rest and get back to normal. I can schedule a psych evaluation for the both of you if needed," Officer Saw shook her head.

"Please General, we are fine, thank you. We aren't the first to be caught in the crossfire of Commander Ren's fury." You agreed with her and the General shrugged. He started to argue but Saw gave him a pat on the shoulder to let him know you were both okay. For a second he looked into Saw's eyes and you smirked. The whole ship had been talking about the possible relationship between Hux and Saw. You knew from personal conversations with her that the rumors were most certainly true. He left soon and you slumped into a chair next to Saw.

"Holy Stormtrooper," You said and put a hand up to your temple. The day had started so normal. You had woken up, had your breakfast and went to work. As usual you met up with Saw and joined her in the daily reports from the Resistance monitoring. Today, however, Kylo Ren had been looking for a place to vent his anger. And your small monitoring room was the perfect target.

"Well, he's just a peach isn't he?" Saw chuckled and you rolled your eyes.

"Who, Ren or your boyfriend?" You asked.

"Both I suppose." She tied back her hair into a low bun and you admired how pretty she was. Saw was the most beautiful person on the ship and she knew it. Apparently the General did too.

"We don't get paid enough for this crap." You sighed.

"We don't get paid period." Saw pointed out and you laughed.

"That's true." A droid rolled over to attach an IV to your arm. You leaned back in the chair and tried to get comfortable. "Its a great day to work for the First Order."