Cheater Cheater

sixteen

~ Grayson ~

I can't bear to look at Taylor's lifeless body anymore, so I leave her parents to grieve at her side. I get in my car and drive to the pier. By now, the police have cleared out so no one is here but me. The sun is setting, and it's a painful reminder of five nights ago when I watched Taylor go over the end of the pier. There's a blood stain where she hit her head. I shudder as the memory plays over and over again.

I never wanted any of this. I hated Taylor and her blonde hair and popularity. Sleeping with her started as a game. I didn't intend to fall for someone I was so intent on despising.

I vividly remember our first time. When I started kissing her I was only thinking about how this could be another trophy for my collection. Then she was underneath me, naked and vulnerable. I couldn't help but be gentle when she asked if it would hurt. She was so innocent. I feel ashamed that I'm thinking about the perfect 'o' her lips made as she came for the first time instead of mourning her death.

I know the exact moment I knew I had fallen for her. I was giving her a tour of my house, and in between our quick fucks around the house, she had stopped in one of the long halls upstairs and was looking out over the foyer and out the giant windows in the front of the house. From there, we had the best view of the sun setting over the town and the ocean in the distance. Taylor was leaning on the railing with her chin in her hands, and was silently watching the beautiful sky. I knew I had fallen for her right then because there aren't many things I love more than sunsets, but at that moment, I could only think of how beautiful she was.

A strong gust of wind brings me out of my head and into the present. I feel the tears running down my cheeks, but I don't feel anything. I feel empty. This losing-you-first-love thing really sucks. I let out a bitter laugh.

I sit with my feet dangling off the edge of the pier, staring out at the ocean. I think about letting myself fall over the edge and not trying to save myself. Drowning would end the pain that is suddenly filling me. But Taylor didn't die, and she was already unconscious when she fell in, so I wouldn't risk surviving. Besides, I couldn't kill myself. I couldn't let Taylor's death be for nothing. I have to live on and remember her.

When it gets dark and a little chilly I head back to my car and go back to the hospital. Taylor's parents are just leaving as I get there.

"How are you holding up, Grayson?" Maggie, Taylor's mom, asks me. I look at her, a little confused. We hadn't talked at all up to this point and she had no idea who I was so I don't know why she would think I'm no okay.

"Hudson told us that you and Taylor were together," Garrett, the dad, tells me. Wow. I didn't think Hudson had that in him.

"I've been better, but I'll survive. I just wanted to make sure you guys were okay," I say. Maggie gives me a tight smile and just hugs me. Garrett joins in and I feel more loved by these two than I ever have by my own parents.

The funeral is three days later, and I can barely get out of bed and force myself to go. I'm just glad Taylor's parents didn't ask me to say anything at the service. I definitely wouldn't be able to do that. Word had gotten out that Taylor was cheating on Hudson with me, so people knew about me, but I didn't want to get up and talk about loving Taylor after everything. No one would believe me.

At the service, a few of Taylor's friends get up and say a few words. Even some teachers from school get up, which surprises me. I didn't think that Taylor would have been such a good student. Hudson doesn't go up, but I know he's in the very back, watching everything silently. He's mortified that everyone found out about me and Taylor.