A Million Last Words | A Calum Hood & Luke Hemmings Fanfic

Chapter 9

~Calums Pov~

"They haven't talked to eachother in days!" "They really need to tell us what's going on.." "This isn't like them, they never really fight"

I lift my head up from my pillow. Its 5pm, I keep falling asleep during the day and waking up at night to just rome around like a zombie. My curtin is shut, the bunks is really dark I can barely find my blanket. I turn on my side to eavesdrop on ashton and Michaels conversation,

"Have you seen luke yet?" Ashton mumbles.

"No, I'm glad Calum came back though.." Michael was trying to talk quietly but I could hear him perfectly clear.

I could careless about what Luke was doing. Probably just fucking another slut he picked up on the street. Thinking about what I walked into made me so upset and jealous and all these emotions I dont know what to do with.

I roll over ruffly, hitting the wall on the other side of me with my body.

"Calum?" Ashton gently opend my curtain. "Are you alright?" He looked in and I cover my face with blankets, they still smelled like Luke from when he sleeped here a few nights ago.

"Go away" I say muffled through all the bedding covering my face.

"You have to get up at some point!" He tries to rip off my blanket and pull me out.

" I don't care" I cuddle back into a ball, the way way I was getting out of bed was if everyone else was asleep.

Ash sits down, trying to stay a little bit away from me, he was acting skittish. Almost like he was scared of me.

"At least tell us whats wrong.. Luke wont spill. Do you wanna see him today cal?" He was acting like I was 10 and my dog got hit by a car or something. I don't say anything, just move tighter into my own grip.

"You hate me.." I say extremely quietly. Ashton moves closer to me, and puts two hands on my shoulder, yanking me onto my back.

"I do not! I was a little mad but I don't hate you." he sets his hand on my chest lightly. I lay there, almost lifeless. My eyes drift around the darkness of my bunk, skipping over ashton.

"Can you please go away" I mumble, rolling over again. I refuse to say over 5 words to anyone. In the last few days I've probably said a total of 50 words.

Ashton places his hand on my side,

"We're here when youre ready.." He stands up, slowly walking away.

One minute he's probably killing me in his mind, the next he's my best friend again, i dont get him.

Why do they keep saying 'go see him' He's on the bus, I think. Why am I thinking about it! He doesn't matter anymore, he can't take it back or say anything that's going to change my opinion.

I reach under my pillow, Searching for the flask that started everything. Once I have it in my hand, I move up. My back to the wall, Slowly unscrewing the lid trying to be quite. I don't know where Ashton and Michael went, but I'm not taking any chances. I dont want to drop back to this level, but its the only way to feel a little happy again.

I take in a mouth full. Personally, I think the taste is gross, but its really all I could get. I swallow hard, shuttering a bit from the buring sensation in my throat. You'd think I would be use to it by now..

I take a few more drinks, swallowing fast then taking another. More than half is gone but I don't care enough to stop.

When its finally empty, I move it away from my mouth, taking a deep breath in. I start to choke, trying to stop myself from coughing. Failing, I start to cough gasping for air besides the liquor tintied air in my throat.

"Calum what are you doing" I can hear Michaels foot steps getting closer to where I am, I keep coughing unable to catch my breath.

Michael slowly opens the curtin, I think he's a little afraid, too.

"What's wrong!" He kinda pulls me out moving my legs off the bed. I go with it, I don't think I have enough strength to fight him at the moment. When I have my back up straight I can breathe a little easier. Finally pulling myself together, Michael is on one knee watching me closely.

"What was all that.." Michael's voice sounding tired and ruff.

"I guess I'm just not up enough.." I try to push the canister under my pillow before he saw it, I'd probably get turned in if they found out I was drinking, again.

"Well then come hang out with us!" Michael stands up and flashes a small smile at me, Reaching for my hand.

"Um no.." I'm trying to act like this is only hurting me half as much as it really was. I keep shifting around, I'm fucking restless and feel really, almost top heavy. I'm trying not to breathe to much while he's infrount of me. My breathe is laced with the smell of gin, He would notice there's no question to that.

He's about to respond, when my phone starts to ring. We both look down at it,

its.. Luke.

"Are you gonna get that?" Michael is talking very seriously. Its not like him.

I don't answer him, handing him my phone. He takes it from my hand, hesitating at first.

"Hey dude, its Michael" he answers.

Why would he think I'd want to talk to him. What made him assume I'd answer.

"Do ya want us to come get you soon?" I hear Michael say to Luke, the more I try not to wonder where he is the more I think about it. "Be there soon, hang tight." He hangs up and throws my phone back at me "Get dressed youre coming" Michael walks over to where ash was laying and hits his legs, he slowly moves up right, looking over at me.

"You are coming" ashton says completely serious.

"Where" I roll back over facing them. Before answering, they just look at eachother.

"Uh, Calum.. Lukes in the hospital."