I'm Not Her

Chapter 37: I'm Not Living With These Lies

"God dammit, put the spoon down and put that stupid ice cream back in the freezer. You need to tell Carter about what happened. I am dead serious Pen," Kylie ordered.

"But ice cream is good."

"And packed with calories."

"But it's so yummy."

"Because of all that sugar."

"But I have to eat it before it expires!"

"It's not going to expire tomorrow. Eat it later...after you exercise it all off. You can't live this way, Penelope."

I glanced down at the ice cream and realized that Kylie was right. Carter was a great guy. Too good to be true, but yet there he was. I sighed, knowing that Kylie's orders were what was actually best for me. 

I put the top back on the ice cream and held the spoon in my mouth. I walked into the kitchen with the ice cream in one hand and my phone in the other. While placing the ice cream back in the freezer where it belonged, the phone went back to its position between my ear and shoulder. I would probably come back for the ice cream later. It was melting anyways. 

I took the spoon out of my mouth and dropped it into the sink. I'd wash it later. Now wasn't the time. Of course, that's what I always told myself so by the end of the day, my sink would be full of silverware, plates, bowls, and other stuff that I saved to wash later. Procrastination at its finest. 

"Good job," Kylie said, "now next is getting changed and heading over to Carter's to set the truth straight. And what I mean is that you tell him everything. The whole entire truth. And I don't mean just a little part of what happened. I mean the whole entire thing. From beginning to end."

"But that means I actually have to leave the apartment. Like go out into sunlight, see people, and dress like I care what people think about me. That actually means I have to fix my hair and apply makeup to my face. I even have to wear a bra! I'd rather sit around my apartment without having to put pants on."

"Too much info there, Penelope," Kylie said, "just a tad bit much. So if you're not going to tell him today, you're gonna go on with kissing him tomorrow during that scene, living with that guilt that you've cheated on him? Is that the kind of person you want to be?"

"Umm..."

"I'm right aren't I? So you're going to go into your closet, change, and go over to Carter's and tell him that you kissed the international popstar Zayn Malik who was your previous boyfriend who you are still completely head over heels in love with."

"Who said I was completely head over heels in love with him? And he doesnt' really need to know that Zayn was my boyfriend...that information isn't necessary," I told her. "Then I'd have to explain the switch...and then...that is so complicated..."

"You told me during your meltdown that you loved him and something about your pet rabbit Sue. I never knew you had a pet rabbit."

"I don't. That's the thing. I was so...I was so nervous around him. It's not even funny how weird I am around him. Words come out of my mouth that aren't meant to come out. That boy will end my existance once day. I swear it."

"So you will tell Carter everything won't you?" Kylie asked.

"Sure," I lied. 

"That's good. I gotta go now Pen. We'll talk tomorrow alright?" 

"Yup."

We hung up. I wasn't going to tell Carter today though. Today was not that day. Nope, not today. But with everything that Kylie had wanted me to do, I can't help but think that she wants Carter and I to breakup. It's like...