Why me? (Jack Gilinsky fan fiction)

Chapter 49

ALEX POV

I couldn't believe jack would say something like that to me. I guess I was a little more upset with my self than Jack. So I admit it, I am officially depressed. I promised my self I would never get like this again but things change.

I slowly walked into my bathroom thinking about how upset Jack would be if he finds out what I'm about to do. But I ignore the thoughts and get out the silver shiny blade that I haven't picked up in years. I slowly graze the blade across my fingertips thinking about how this will effect everyone. But again I ignore the thoughts.

Finally, I put the bald on my skin and make a slash across my arm. I start crying knowing that I am such a screw up. I've always hated myself and I always will. I can't even believe Jack would like someone like me. I make 15 more slashes and drop the blade. Watching my blood ooze out my arm.

I dropped the blade and started to cry. I didn't cry because Jack yelled at me, or because I couldn't have a baby. I simply cried because I was tired of trying to hold in all my emotion I finally had broken.

I hear jack coming into the room.

"Lex can you open the door I really need to talk to you."

I ignored him and continued to cry.

"Lex. You okay?"

I continued crying

"Baby, answer me. I'm sorry for what I said I really am, I should have never yelled at you like that."

"Wait are you crying."

He started to become more and more worried. He started yelling my name and kept telling me to open the door.

"ALEX OPEN THE DAMN DOOR" he yelled

"Alex if you don't open this door right now I'm breaking it down."

And that's exactly what he did. Inevitably he saw me laying on the ground with blood everywhere he was shocked. He stared to cry.

"You promised"
"You promised you would never do this again." He said looking and sounding heartbroken.

I just sat there looking at him and feeling even more terrible about myself because I made him cry.

"Yea Jack I did promise. And I'm sorry that I did this, I'm sorry that I put you through all this. I'm sorry that I'm not perfect, I'm sorry that I can't have a kid, I'm sorry that I'm such a fucking screw up. I-I-I I'm so sorry Jack, I'm so sorry." I was crying my eyes out by now.

Jack came over to me not caring that he was getting blood all over him.

"Hey I don't ever want to hear you say something like that ever again okay?"
"I love you so much Lex and you are most definitely not a screw up. I love you so much."

I cried into Jack and he held me. he held me like I was the most important thing in his life.
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Damn it's been like 2 months since I have updated. But anyway hope you guys lied this chapter cause I sure did. Like always please vote, comment, and follow me.

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