When The World Fails You

When The World Fails You Part 16

I had a different plan.

They didn’t talk to me the whole time. Lunch was especially awkward when Grace walked in with a big smile on her face. It disappeared as soon as she saw what I was wearing.

“Madison, why aren’t you dressed?” She asked, her voice strict with impatience for my actions.

I shrugged, eating my bowl of cereal. “I’m not going.”

“Oh so your going to play this game are you?” She crosses her arms. “Go upstairs and get ready right now, we have to leave around four.”

I finished my cereal and went to the sink to wash my bowl. It had a couple of dirty dishes.

“What, you guys can’t clean up after yourselves?” I look at Grace and Matt.

“That’s what the maids are for.” Matt didn’t bother to look up at me.

“Jerk…” I mumbled and turned on the water.

“Why are you ignoring me?” Grace grew angry and walked up to me. “What? Is it because of that Maria thing?”

I turned to her. “Maria thing? Maria thing? Do you not remember everything I’ve been through with her-”

“Oh God, Madison that was years ago!” Grace rolled her eyes and walked back over to Matt.

“It doesn’t matter!” I yelled at her. “She was there with me!”

I threw the dishes back in the sink and walked off, trying not to break down in front of her and her stupid pet monkey named Matt.

“Madison!” She calls after me.

I turn to her. “What?”

“Your going to get ready still right?”

My jaw almost dropped.

“NO!” I scream. She jumps, shocked by my outburst.

I go into my room and slam the door, locking it behind me.

I ignore my parents threats to turn off my phone if I don’t come out. I ignore my mom calling me a brat and demanding I face her while she yells at me. I ignore tears slipping out of my eyes as I try to scan my computer to waste time. Finally, after giving up, they leave me alone. I turn off my computer and go back to sleep.

I dream about random things. Being at the beach and seeing people jumping into the ocean from a ladder. Running away from ducks. Laughing at something I can’t remember. Then it fades into black…

Then, I awake.

And its dark.

I get up and walk out of my room. I know I’m alone because I hear absolutely nothing and it scares me.

I’m not sure what takes over me. The fact that I’m alone or the fact that everything inside my body is aching from sadness. I grab a bottle of wine from my Mom’s cabinet and open it. I take a long ‘sip’ and taste the bitterness. Perfect.

Time flies by when your alone and drunk.

I finished that whole bottle like a fuckin boss.

Everything feels fuzzy and warm by the time I grab my car keys and walk out of the house. I hop in the car and drive off, trying to see the road ahead.

Its all blurry from here on end anyways.

　

Ray

Mom threw a birthday party for Miranda. The whole family was over, adults drinking in the garage, teenagers trying to sneak beer in the house, and the kids in the backyard playing in the jumper. I sat outside with my cousin George, smoking cigarettes. He was my age and was into the hip hop scene. It was more underground than anything. He introduces me to a lot of real good songs. Every once in awhile he’ll come up from Inglewood with some burned CD’s for me.