Emma: The Glow Within (Book 2, HTTYD Fanfic)

37: My Fault

My gaze was drawn to Daniel where he lay lifeless on the ground. "DANIEL!" I jumped up and ran to him. I put my hand over his heart, and I felt no heart beat.

He was dead.

Daniel was dead.

"Danny!" I cradled his head to my chest. I leaned in and whispered into his ear, "No."

"I didn't kill him." A voice spoke, and my gaze snapped up to meet Ezra's. "You did."

You did...

His voice echoed through my head, making me want to scream. Anger boiled through my veins. I felt enraged.

I roared, jumping up and shoving my hands forward, my powers throwing Ezra threw the air and slamming him into a rock formation, making parts of the rock crumble. He cried out in surprise and hissed in pain.

My vision seems to go red, and I snapped, roaring again and tightening my grip. I clench my fist, my powers strangling him, before flinging him to the ground, his head crashing against a rock.

I heard a faint cracking sound, and Ezra clutched his head where it hit the rock.

I should have felt guilty...But I didn't.

It felt so right to see him wither in pain. He deserved it.

He raised a hand in an attempt to defend himself, but I stomped down on his hand, the sound of his fingers cracking under my foot reaching my ears. Lava surged through my veins, my blood boiling in pure hatred.

I still felt ridiculous amounts of anger and I kicked him in the stomach. He groaned and rolled over onto his back.

Fury ate away at me, consuming my every thought. I wanted him to feel pain. I wanted him to burn.

I screamed again and threw him up and against a tree and threw my fist across his face. Blood spilled from his lip and jaw. I looked down at my bleeding knuckles from the force of the blow, mixing with Ezra's blood that covered my hands.

It felt good.

It felt right.

He deserved this. All of it.

He coughed up more blood and turned to me, his hands held out in surrender. "E-Emma..." he whimpered.

Something within me snapped again, and I unsheathed a small knife. I roared and Ezra moved his head, the blade connecting with the tree where his head had been a moment before.

He kicked me in the stomach and I stumbled back, surprised at the attack. He wiped the blood off of his brow with his sleeve, looking just as angry as I was.

Only he wasn't.

I was more angry than he would ever be.

A piercing battle cry sounded from my lips and I swung the dagger downwards toward his heart. He caught it and we both gripped the handle of the blade.

We fought over it, neither of us letting go. I cried out as he rammed me into a tree, as we still fought over the knife.

I growled as we stumbled aimlessly, our grip on the handle turning our knuckles white. We spun around and he managed to back me into another tree. He held the dagger above my heart, but I pushed back with almost equal force.

Almost.

The blade slowly inched toward me, but I fought back relentlessly. I glanced back at Daniel's lifeless body, and pure rage engulfed me. I threw Ezra off of me and he lost his grip on the knife, leaving it in my hand.

I lunged with the knife toward his heart, but he rolled out of the way and it plunged into his shoulder. He roared in agony as I ripped the blade out, hearing the sound of his cracking bone and ripping flesh.

He backed up into another tree and I lunged at him again, only managing to stab his other shoulder. He whimpered in pain and I roared in frustration.

Lightning splintered somewhere above me, illuminating the sky in an eerie purple glow. A deafening clap of thunder boomed, but I ignored it.

The usually smug expression Ezra wore had drained from his face, and now he just looked desperate. I bit my lip so hard, it started to bleed.

I hated him.

I wanted him to die.

Ezra grabbed my wrist that held the dagger and he tried to push me away from him, but I pushed back, barely budging.

Then, in one fluid movement, I wrenched the knife to his neck, slicing a shallow cut and holding it there. Ezra winced, but didn't dare move any more than that.

For a moment, neither moved, neither spoke. We breathed heavily in unison and I gazed up into his maroon eyes.

Kill him... a voice in my head hissed.

I tried to move my hand forward, but it wouldn't listen to me. My hand wouldn't move. Ezra stared at me with a blank expression. It wasn't smug, it wasn't desperate...just a stare.

Slowly, my fury started to retreat.

I couldn't do it.

I couldn't kill him.

I let go of the knife and it clattered to the ground. Tears sprung to my eyes, and I squeezed them shut, raining tears down my cheeks. I stumbled back as if from an invisible blow.

I let out a sob and collapsed to my knees. I clutched my churning stomach and leaned forward, sobbing freely, my eyes still still squeezed shut.

I felt like my heart was made of glass, being slowly shattered.

Unable to stop myself, I wept, raising my blood-stained hands to the sides of my pulsing head. I was crying so hard, I literally choked on my sobs, coughing and gasping for air before letting out another sob.

I gripped my hair and slightly tugged on it. A hesitant hand was placed on my shoulder and I jumped, snapping my eyes open and locking them with Ezra's.

His expression was etched with slight confusion, shock, and regret. "I'm...I'm sorry." He released my shoulder before disappearing into thin air.

I shut my eyes again and my heart clenched with grief. I sobbed repeatedly, shuttering and convulsing when I gasped for air.

I crawled over to Daniel's body and hugged him to my chest, bringing his ear up to my lips. "Please wake up." I whispered, my tears dripping and gliding down his face. "Please."

I softly kissed him on the lips and collapsed to the ground, all my strength leaving me.

I trembled uncontrollably and lay my head on the moss covered ground.

Daniel is gone.

He's gone.

It's my fault...my fault...

I'm a monster.

Dark thoughts crippled my mind, and I wept until sleep overtook me.