Ok guys these are obviously not my jokes they come these came from ... read my jokes you'll find them
How you elect to spend New Year's Eve will depend on your:
1. age
2. remaining levels of optimism
3. threshold of pain
- Joseph Connolly
Every New Year's I have the same question: "How did I get home?"
- Melanie White
An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.
- Bill Vaughan
On New Years, just remember: if your cup runneth over, you've probably reached your limit.
- Melanie White
My new year's resolution is to get better at pretending to know the words to Auld Lang Syne.
- waitwait @waitwait
New Years parades have a lot in common with Santa Claus. Nobody is awake to see either one of them.
- Melanie White
Every New Years I celebrate making it through another holiday season without killing my relatives.
- Melanie White
My new years resolution is not to shovel snow. Since I'm gonna be in Florida, I feel pretty good about it.
- Greg Tamblyn
New Year's Eve, when auld acquaintances be forgot. Unless, of course, those tests come back positive.
- Jay Leno
Wait a second, there's ANOTHER year? I have to do it all over again???
- Jake Vig @Jake_Vig
I love when they drop the ball in Times Square. It's a nice reminder of what I did all year.
- Bridger Winegar @bridger_w
I like New Years. The confetti covers up my dandruff.
- Melanie White
The first week of January, gyms and yoga classes everywhere are packed with people who made new years resolutions to tone up. It's like sardines in there. Big sardines. But they're all gone by February.
- Anonymous
Every New Years I resolve to lose 20 pounds, and I do. The problem is that I gain 30.
- Melanie White
My brother's New Year's resolution is to move out of my parents house. You'd think after 49 years he'd try another one.
- Wickedwordslinger @StephenBCramer
I think it's great to make your first date a New Year's party. That way, you're at least sure you'll get to first base.
- Melanie White
My grandparents had resolutions like donating more time & money to charities. I've decided to make my own coffee once a week.
- Erica
...http://www.funny-jokes-quotes-sayings.com/new-year-jokes.html ok guys I am writing another story. It's actually romance story with a lot of music involved. So it would be great if you read it thanks. And also it seems like I only give out jokes on holidays give me some ideas that I can share some jokes with you.
YOU ARE READING
!Warning:This will make you laugh!
Humori update and try to write some more jokes frequently but i write a lot of jokes in one chappter instead of one in one chapter. i think ill also add in puns and combacks. I don't even know this book is a lot of things. Caution: this will make you la...
