Why Can't This Be Love (A7X/M Shadows Fan Fic)

Chapter Eleven

  "I'm so sorry Stephanie,but it'll be alright." He says and I look up at him.

"I start chemotherapy in a couple days. I'll loose all of my hair Jimmy. Then if it's still not any better they'll have to remove my breast. What if I die Jimmy. But what if I live,but Matt won't love me anymore because of how hideous I'll look." I say and he wipes my tears.

  "Hey loosing your hair won't be so bad,it'll be easier to shower,and you won't have to worry about straightening it curling it,or it getting in your mouth when it's windy." He says and I smile slightly.

  "And if you have to lose your boob,you could always just stuff your bra,a lot of girls did it in high school. And you won't die Stephanie,I won't let that happen and neither will the other guys. And as for Matt,don't think for a second like that. Matt will be by your side the whole time and no matter what happens, he will always love you the same." He says and I smile as he wipes away my tears and kisses my cheek.

  "Now give me that happy smile,you'll get through this Stephanie I know you will,your a fighter I know you won't give up." He says and I smile,taking a huge long deep breath.

  "I have to tell Matt." I say and he nods.

  "I'll be here if you need to talk to me again." He says and I nod and hug him,thanking him as I do so.

  But when I get back to my car,I just can't help myself and begin to cry again. Cancer. How though why me? I hope Jimmy's right about everything.

  When I get home,my heart sinks to find that Matt isn't here. But now at least I have time to figure out how to tell him.

  I lay on my bed,and stare at the wall,trying not to cry. I'll have to tell everyone else too. And my parents who I haven't talked to in forever.

I go over to my piano,and begin to play,and decide to sing and play Bennie And The Jets,one of my favorite songs growing up.

In the middle of singing Matt sits down next to me,and when I look at him he gives me a small smile.

"God I love your singing." He says when I'm done and I blush,but my gut feels twisted when I realize I need to tell him.

"So I went to the doctors today." I say and he turns his attention to me,and raises his eyebrows.

"It's cancer." I let out,and of course I begin to cry again.

"Wait what! It is?" He asks and I nod,letting out all the tears forming in my eyes,and he pulls me into a hug.

"Oh god Stephanie what's gonna happen?" He asks worried.

   "Well I'm gonna start chemotherapy,and so all of my hair is gonna fall out I'm gonna be bald Matt. Then if it doesn't work they're gonna have to remove my breast and I just ugh god I'm gonna look so hideous." I cry into his chest but he pulls me away and makes me look in his eyes.

"Hey it'll be alright,you'll still be as beautiful as ever Stephanie don't worry about it. And I'm not gonna leave your side I'll be here for you all the way,I promise I'll love you no matter what." He says,causing me to smile.

"Thank you Matt. What if....what if I die?" I ask and my voice cracks from crying.

"Don't say that,I won't let it happen I promise." He says and I nod,pulling him into one last hug.

"Why do I have cancer Matt this isn't fair I'm so scared." I say letting out the last of my tears.

"I don't know,and I'm sorry Stevie but I promise you'll make it through this. Now let's go eat some pizza and watch a Marvel movie." He says and I smile and nod.

We sit on the couch,eating slices of pizza and we decided to watch Spider-Man. He told me that tomorrow he will help me tell everyone else about me having cancer,which makes me feel a little better.

I put our plates away,and I go back over to the couch,and rest my head on his chest as he wraps his arm around me. He kisses the top of my head,and I smile.

"I love you Matt." I say and he replies with I love you too.

When the movie ends,I stay snuggled up against him,and we don't say a word to each other. I just lay there,starring blankly at the wall as I listen to his heart beat. And just for a minute,I forget about everything that's happening.

My eyes soon start to shut,and Matt picks me up bridal style,carrying me up to our bedroom. He lays me down under covers,and before he lays down himself he turns off the light.

I snuggle back up close to him,as he wraps his arms around me.

"Goodnight Stevie." He whispers.

"Goodnight Mattie." I reply,and after a few minutes I drift off to sleep,his calming heartbeat still running through my head.