Chapter 20

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I agreed to stay over at Bobbie's house tonight, but now I'm having second thoughts.

After Hunter and Nixon's congregation in the kitchen I began to feel a sense of anxiety come over me.

I'm not going to lie and say Hunter didn't make me feel good earlier, because he did, but I'm wondering if it was a mistake.

Nixon had glared at me one last time before he stomped up the stairs towards Jayden's room I'm guessing.

Hunter didn't look back at me before he also went up the stairs. The only thing is, I don't know where he went.

Bobbie's in the shower and I'm debating whether I should tell her about what happened between Hunter and I. It's going to be really awkward though. It's her brother.

A few minutes later she walks out in a tank top and fuzzy pajama pants.

"I'm guessing you'll need pajamas?" She smiles.

I'm not sure how I got this lucky with my friends, but even after finding out their in the Mafia I'm still grateful for them and I wouldn't change it for the world.

"Yeah, and can I take a shower?" I know she'll say yes, but I don't want it to seek like I'm taking advantage of them.

"You really don't have to ask me, Jacey. You practically live in this house as well, so if you want to take a shower, then take a shower," she giggles and I smile softly.

She looks at me longly before grabbing some pajama pants and a tank top as well for me. She also gives me a pair of underwear, clean of course, since I only have the ones I'm wearing.

"Your toothbrush is still in there, and you know where the towels are."

I nod and walk into her ensuite.

I lock the door behind me, even though I'm not that worried someone will walk in on me.

I strip off my clothing until I'm completely naked and turn on the high tech shower.

The water is warm when I step in and I instantly relax.

So much is going on in my head it's hard for me to think of anything else.

Hunter. Nixon. My parents. The Mafia.

Everything is just circling around my head...

And for once, I let it out. I cry.

Tears run down my cheeks and I sink to the bottom of the shower, holding my knees to my chest.

I feel dirty, I'm keeping secrets from so many people and it's causing me major anxiety and stress.

First, kissing Hunter and then keeping that secret for a while. Finding out my friends are in the Mafia and not being able to tell anyone, even my parents. And then lastly, Hunter and I's intimate moment.

I feel like there's no escape from all these secrets and regrets. My life was fine up until a month ago. I was normal, moving to a new state every few months.

"Jacey?" Bobbie knocks on the door. I've been in here for at least twenty minutes just crying.

"Yes?" I croak and mentally curse at myself for being so fragile.

"Are you crying?" She asks and I sniffle, wanting to cry, but keep it in.

"I-I'll be out in a minute," I say and try standing up, but my legs feel numb.

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