Based on a true story. Aka my life, names and locations have been changed to protect the identities of those involved. ;) Bai!
Lady_Bug_Slayer: so you mean to tell me ladybugs aren't the evilest creatures to come to earth? Are you serious?! That's worse then when Maya tried to tell me cockroaches weren't the devil spawn!
Getting.all.the.guys.since.1998 is typing...
While I waited for my girl best friend Isabella to respond I got up to make some Nutella toast. Yes, I know it's like five in the afternoon, don't judge me!
When I got back Bella was still typing. Jeez woman, how long does it take to reply?!
Ping. Finally.
Getting.all.the.guys.since.1998: Your fear of bugs is not healthy! You flipped when you saw a beetle on the ground and whacked Maya upside the head! Remember that time on Fourth of July at my moms barbecue? When you knocked over all the food because you were running from a butterfly?! We need to get you help, immediately.
Lady_Bug_Slayer: Just because I am the only one who has a problem with being around the reincarnation of satan doesn't mean I have a problem!
Getting.all.the.guys.since.1998: Oh gosh...you're insane. I gotta go, bye Ainsley!
Lady_Bug_Slayer: I TOLD YOU MY NAME IS CUPCAKE! Baiiiii.
I closed my laptop and went downstairs. I heard a crash and someone yelling.
"-cking piece of sh-"
"Hi mom!" I interrupted. I gestured to the mess on the floor.
"Hey sweetie! How are you doing?" She asked using her foot to scoot the liquidy mashed potatoes under the stove. I gave her the look. You know the one.
"So, dinner isn't going well?" I asked. "How about we clean this up and we can order pizza?" I swear I'm the parent of this relationship.
"It's not my fault the potatoes attacked me!" She protested. I raised my eyebrow. She sighed and began wiping up the potatoes. I grabbed the phone on the counter and dialed the pizza place, I forgot the actual name so I just call it the pizza place.
"Welcome to Johnnies Pizzeria! How may I help you?" A well known voice answered.
"Heyyy Chan Chan! I'll take the usual." Chandler has been my best friend since...ever really.
"So you'll have one medium pepperoni with the pepperoni in the shape of a heart, one medium sausage with the sausages in the shape of a star, two large orders of breadsticks, one cheese one original and a large sprite." Chan rambled.
"Yup!" I replied.
"Is that Ainsley on the phone? Tell her we need some help at the pizzeria! We'll pay in breadsticks!" The owner, Marco, shouted from the other end of the line.
"Why kind of breadsticks?" I questioned. Chan repeated my question to Marco.
"Any kind!" I laughed. Marco was really nice. He was in his late forties and has been running Johnnies for twenty years. His great grandfather was Johnnie.
"I'll think about it!" To Chan I said,"Delivery or pick up?"
"I'm on the last five minutes of my shift, I'll bring it."
"Kay! Bye."
"Bye." I hung up the phone and turned back to see my mom with her hands on her hips.
"Your eyebrows are trying to escape your face." I calmly informed her. She smirked.
"Ainsley and Chandler sitting in a tree! K-I-S-"I clamped my hand over her mouth. Something wet and warm touched my hand. I resisted the urge to gag.
"I have changed countless diapers, saliva doesn't scare me." Lies! It's not healthy to lie to yourself. Oh shut up subconscious we'll talk later.
My mother glared at me and I laughed, pulling my hand away.
"You're despicable," she said.
"At least I'm not shipping my daughter and her best guy friend!" I retorted. We continued this childish bickering until Chandler walked in with dinner. This is his second house, his house is my second. We have had countless sleepovers, so it wasn't anything new.
We spent the next two hours stuffing our faces and joking around.
"Would you rather face plant or fart in front of your crush?" I asked. This game never gets old.
"Face plant," my mom and Chan answered. They were so alike, seriously it was creepy.
"MOVIE MARATHON!" They shouted.
So we spent the whole night watching Disney and Pixar movies. I drifted off after The Lion King III came on.
I woke up to a warm liquid on my face. I opened my eyes to see Chandlers hazel ones staring back at me. Slowly, I put two and two together.
"You licked me you idiot!" I screeched and began to beat him with my pillow.
"Can you guys have intercourse somewhere else? Some people are trying to sleep without having to her the moans and screeches," my mom mumbled from the couch. Chan and I slept on the floor. My mouth fell open.
"Close your mouth dear, you'll catch flies," my mother said without opening her eyes. I looked at Chan and he just shrugged. Weirdo family I have, run and hide I must.
"You're it! Count to thirty!" I yelled and ran upstairs.
We ended up playing hide and seek, tag, mother may I, and red light green light. I will never grow out of those games. It was like eleven am once we finished and I made Chan make me waffles.
"But their SOOO hard!" He protested, already pulling out the mix.
"They have to work to get the muscles that pancakes don't have. Therefore you are a pancake." He glared at me and then glanced at the powdered mix in the plastic bowl. Next thing you know my mouth and eyes are full of powder.
Wiping my eyes I grab an egg. He backs away shaking his head. I chuck it as hard as I can and it hits his chest.
"MWAHAHAHAHAHA the bakery Queen has won--ah!" My mouth was stuffed with...blueberries.
"I'm allergic to blueberries remember?!" He started freaking out.
"Should I perform CPR? Or is it MIA? Maybe it's LOL? I'll call an ambulance! Wait, what if they're closed? My grandma had to go to the hospital but the my didn't get to her fast enough so she performed surgery on her foot all by herself, she makes me so proud to be a father. Maybe I should be a surgeon, or a lawyer, maybe an astronaut!"
"Chandler?" I asked.
"What?" I squirted whipped cream at his questioning face.
