Too Far (A Dan Howell Fanfiction)

16- Until my phone rang.

He stood emotionless, like he was prey. My mouth opened, but I didn't have anything to say. My eyebrows widened. I needed to say something to make this less awkward. But I didn't know what. Everything I could say would be graceless. I didn't know if I was happy, or annoyed, or angry, or excited. I didn't know what to feel, because all these emotions hit me at once like a storm.

"Umm-" was all I could get out for the first few seconds. My mind was a dial-up that wouldn't process fast enough. I shook it off right away.

"Mike." Was what I finally. He kind of awkwardly smiled at me, both hands in his pockets. I hadn't seen him in years. Many many years. Oh, I should tell you...he's an ex of mine, but I'll get into details as needed.

"Hi, Anna." He swallowed. I was shocked. I opened my mouth once again, but also again, no words came out. I was just stunned? Or maybe confused. Confused and stunned.

"Hi? What are you doing here? How-how are you?" I smirked a bit. He went down the steps and in front of me.

"I thought you were in there." He giggled at himself.

"Well I'm not." I paused. "I'm out here." I giggled in return. It was so awkward, why did I say that? "How are you?" I repeated as he put his arms out for a hug. I almost didn't want to because of the mood I was in, but I didn't want to be rude.

"Good, well...ok. I guess. what about you?"

"Well." I paused. "A lot's going on, but I mean, it could be worse. A lot worse." I spared him from the details. But could it honestly get any worse for me.

"Oh, well do you want to talk about it?... Over lunch or something?" He invited. "There is this really pretty outdoor restaurant up the block. I think it's new." I didn't answer. He just came out of nowhere. What the heck was I supposed to do?

"I'm actually in the middle of something. " I swallowed. "You should have called first. Can we resched-"

"I tried calling this morning but you didn't answer. I thought I'd just stop by while I was here." He interrupted.

"Oh, of course." I paused. "Sorry. I've been out for a few days." I nodded. "Can we do this another time?" I repeated.

"Yea, ....of course...." He sighed. "Well actually...erm, no. Not really. I'm only in London until tomorrow morning, I believe." He took out his phone to check his calendar. "Yea, I don't know for sure. Sorry."

I kind of wanted to just talk with him. Like just go out on a limb and it won't be so awkward. Just talk with anyone, actually. Especially since he was leaving soon, I could tell him anything (well not anything) and he couldn't act different around me because he wouldn't be with me after this. I've wanted to tell Dan or Phil things but I'm stuck with them now. Well, I shouldn't say 'stuck', I'm lucky to have them, but I don't know if they'd act differently if I'd constantly pour my heart out to them.

"You know what, I could use some food." I smiled.

"Really? Yea, lets go." He lit up.

"Oh, wait. Let me just do a few things?" I pointed at the front door and shook the keys in my left hand.

"Of course. Sorry." He stepped out of the way and followed me up the steps. I unlocked it and the cold air inside hit me. The empty echoing household was a lot cooler now that its bare. I just stood there for a few seconds, taking in the scent of home. Or actually, what was left of it.