That's What She Said

In Which a Chicken Dances

"Oh crabs," words flew out of my mouth before I realized. "You're him."

Condom looked startled. "What does that mean?"

"You're a--" sick son of a buttnugget and Trash hates you. And your dad. You destroyed us, dickhead.

This guy's dad was like the supreme nacho leader over the other del tacos. He was a dictator, stuff of legend and horrors.

Cause he had money. And people with money were to be feared, or so Trash society dictates. He called the shots, his family was in fact, the one who made the segregation between the two classes. Trash and Golds.

I was so unlucky.

Clamping my mouth shut, I took an uneasy smile as a facade. "Not as important as those sirens."

Trojan adopted a twisted smile.

Suddenly, there was a shout. "The door's open!" Came a yell. "Mr. Wineheart? Is everything alright?"

Trojan's arm shot out and grabbed my arm. "Help!" He all of a sudden cried.

Then he slammed himself into the wall.

"Are you insane?" I yelled. He glanced up and smirked at me, before his face twisted in agony.

"Help!" He shouted again.

The door burst open and police filed in with flashlights. Sirens wailed in the distance and the red and blue colors whirled against the walls and splattered across our skin.

"Hands up!" An officer yelled, pepper spray--really, pepper spray?--brandished in front of them. "Away from Mr. Wineheart!"

"I'm not even touching him!" I shouted, throwing my hands at the obvious distance between the Taco Supreme Leader's son.

Could they not see? Were Golds blind, or was it just me?

Trojan wiggled closer to me.

"Condom, stay!" I shouted, without thinking.

Trojan paused, eyes furrowed as he looked up. "What did you say?"

My arms flailing, my immediate reaction to any distress mode, I resembled a flying chicken being chased by a murderous butcher. Bwak Bwak.

Unfortunately, the police thought this was a sign of attack. Instantly, shouts of alarm ran around me, and I was tackled to the ground with a mighty roar.

Muttering a string of made up curses, I struggled against the giant body of one officer. Too many donuts, this one. I felt like I was being smooshed into a chicken nugget.

"Can't breathe!" I wheezed, shoving him. I slapped his arm.

"She's attacking me!" The policeman yelled.

I stilled, chest constricting against the ground. "No! No I'm not--"

All I got was the sound of a shhhhh! And my eyes began to burn. Being the chicken, I screamed. "You pepper sprayed me! That's pepper spray!"

Oh god my eyes hurt like crazy, watering and tears pouring down my puffy eyes.

"Quickly, handcuff the criminal before she does more harm!" Trojan called, and the police complied.

The fat officer grabbed my arms and twisted behind my back, until I felt cold metal click into place.

Nonononno. This can't be happening. I only have fifteen minutes left until I could go back-- I wasn't supposed to be arrested.