Fat? (Xiuhan fan fiction)

Fat

Xiumin would always practice hard on his choreography to mama but whenever he went back to the dorm, it was like he didn't want to talk to any of the other members...it was like he thought he was lower than all of them in ranks of looks he thought he was the ugliest and couldn't even bare looking into a mirror.

Once Xiumin took his shower, he went into his bedroom and was just going to go to sleep when Luhan asks "Xiumin, aren't you going to have dinner with all of us. You haven't ate anything since lunch" Luhan asks Xiumin in a smile but Xiumin didn't even want to look at Luhan's face.

"Come on Xiumin, it's not healthy to skip meals~" Luhan says, shaking Xiumins shoulder.

Xiumin then sighed, getting up from his bed and walking outside to the table where all the other members were already eating.

Luhan then took his seat next to Xiumin's and Luhan then asks "Xiumin, why aren't you eating?" Watching Xiumin playing with the food on the end of his chopsticks.

Xiumin sighed, slowly picking up the food on his plate and eating it, chewing it slowly and looked down at his plate in sadness.

"Hyung are you alright, you don't seem so happy?" Lay asks, looking at Xiumin's facial expression.

Xiumin sighed as he explains "I don't feel too well, I haven't been feeling too well ever since this morning..." Xiumin says, with only taking a couple bites out of his meal he pushes his plate away and walked away, back to his room which everyone just looked at Xiumin confused.

As Xiumin walked back into his bedroom he stood in front of the full body mirror and sighed. He started hating his reflection.

Whenever he looked into the mirror he would see someone ten times bigger than himself, but he thought that person was himself. "I-I'm not fat" Xiumin repeats, looking at himself in the mirror, with his eyes deceiving him. He fell onto his knees and looked at himself, totally embarrassed of himself.

As Xiumin went back into his bed and stopped crying, not too long Luhan came into the room and sat on the egde of Xiumin's bed, asking "Xiumin...are you seriously okay...you haven't been like yourself lately" Luhan asks, looking at Xiumin seriously.

"I haven't been feeling well, that's all..." Xiumin says, looking at Luhan in a smile.

"Is it because we'll be debuting next week with mama?" Luhan asks, looking at Xiumin a little confused.

Xiumin nodded, lying to Luhan "I am, a little" Xiumin says, weakly smiling.

"Well I'll be here for you Xiumin, you don't have to worry~" Luhan says, kissing Xiumin's forehead, then getting up, continuing to say "do you want me to turn the lights off?"

"Sure" Xiumin says and with that Luhan turned off the light and the two boys then went to bed, sleeping.

In the middle of the night Xiumin woke up with his stomach growling, he hadn't ate anything properly all day because he didn't want people watching him eat, so he was starving.

As Xiumin got into the kitchen he found some instant noodles and once he was done making it, he started eating them quietly, in peace.

Xiumin then thought back to what Sehun had said, about how if he ate he'd get 'fatter' and also asking if he even knew how to control his weight.

As Xiumin finished the noodles he put the rest in the garbage and was about to go back to his room when Sehun stops him.

"Jeez, why is it him who finds me?!" Xiumin thought to himself, a little upset.

"Are you being serious, you're eating, again?!" Sehun asks, a little angry.

"I was eating because I didn't really eat lunch or dinner, I was starving" Xiumin says, defending himself.

"Ugh, can you just stop! First I was just picking on you because you were with Luhan the whole time but we're one week to debut and you're still like this! I'm embarrassed just being in the same group as you, I don't want to be a group with someone as big as you!" Sehun says, looking at Xiumin in disgust.

Sehun then sighed as he squished Xiumin's stomach and says "you're going to get no fans if you keep this up...no one's going to like you and your family will be embarrassed because of you...you think they'll want to brag about their whale son dancing on stage with a bunch of skinny guys?" Sehun asks, looking at Xiumin seriously.

Xiumin looked at Sehun in anger but tried holding back his tears as he turned away and went to the washroom, forcing Sehun to let go of his stomach.

As Xiumin got into the washroom he stayed in there, bringing his knees up to his chest and crying, sobbing into his hands.

Xiumin staid in the washroom until the morning when the manager came knocking on everyone's bedroom door to wake them up.

Xiumin left the washroom with his eyes still pink and puffy. He looked tired with bags under his eyes and he had a frown plastered onto his face.

As he went into his bedroom to get his clothing Luhan caught a glimpse of Xiumin's face and asks, concerned "Xiumin, what happened to you?"

"I couldn't fall asleep last night" Xiumin says in a lie, grabbing his clothes and walking out of his bedroom to go into the washroom and change.

Once Xiumin was done changing, he did his hair and brushed his teeth, then headed out to go to the practice room with the others.

Practice went well with both groups learning on their own choreography, on top of that on brakes Luhan would be teaching Xiumin Chinese, along with Tao teaching Kris and Lay teaching Chen.

The EXO-M members were busy learning both their choreography, how to speak Chinese, and on top of that learning their lyrics to MAMA, and since it was a song in a different language for the Korean members, it was even harder for them to get the pronunciation right.

Once the song was complete with everyone singing their own part, and once everyone finally got everything in sync, everyone cheered in joy, going out to celebrate at a fancy restaurant to eat.

"You kids did a good job!" The manager says in a smile, looking at all the boys and the boys then smile, thanking the manager for his kind words.

As the food got brought to the table everyone dug in, happy but when Xiumin saw the food he didn't want to touch it, he wanted to leave the table and not eat anything all together but with everyone asking if he was alright, he felt pressured to eat, so he did.

After Xiumin was done all the food on his plate, he walked into the bathroom and just stared at himself in the mirror. He couldn't help but hate his squishy, chubby cheeks, he started hating the way he looked. He squeezed his cheeks, wanting to take them away, but he couldn't.

He felt tears starting to appear in his eyes again, just looking in the mirror made him cry and he hated it, he really did.

As Xiumin walked out of the washroom he was controlling his breathing so he could hold himself back so he wouldn't cry.

When Xiumin got back to the table, everyone was already getting up leaving and Xiumin quickly followed behind.

Back at the dorm the first thing everyone did was go to bed and so did Xiumin, but like every night, he had another nightmare about his weight.

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I know this was a short chapter and I'm so, so, so, sorry! I will definitely write a long chapter next time because next time is when they debut, and if you all have been into EXO as long as I have, you know that's when all the sasaeng fans came out and started bashing Xiumin. That'll be talked about in the next chapter. What I also want to say is that it made me cry...back then when I read all of them it made me cry because i hated seeing Xiumin in pain and now I have to read about them all over again... it makes you cry with how much Xiumin suffered, its just really, really sad and upsetting to hear. I cried so much because of Xiumin, I feel that he never thought of himself as good enough and went through so much just to please some sasaeng fans! It makes my blood boil when I hear someone call Xiumin fat and I always rant on them about it...and just seeing all these things make me cry...in the next upcoming chapters I'm going to tell you now that I'm sorry if you become teary eyed or if you start crying because I definitely cried just thinking about the past...