Chapter 40 - Memories

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Everything flooded back. 

"Calm. Relax. You want to sleep, dae. Sleep."

Rena heard herself speaking, saw her fingers reaching out to stroke the dae's chin gently, felt the ley rush through her body as the dae submitted to her wish, but nothing was connected. They were things happening around her. Automatic, driven by the memories and experiences and thoughts her mind was drowning under. 

The dae slumped to the ground, asleep, leaving Rena backed against the wall, trying to put everything back into place. 

She was Rena. Rena. Not just the word the human--Cayden! That was Cayden, how had she forgotten?--had called her after pulling her from the ash, but her name. Those two syllables sank somewhere deep inside her mind and clicked. Even before the portal had taken her name to prevent her own mind from destroying it entirely, she'd never felt like this. 

She was whole. 

Rena stood up, finding her feet. The portal. Inside the portal. I remember now. 

Remember what? asked a voice, startling Rena. Are you okay? What happened? 

Uh, was all Rena managed at first. Who are you? 

I don't know! replied the voice. We were trying to figure that out together, and then there was this bright flash of light and suddenly I could see! It paused for a second, and Rena found herself able to actually feel its movements. Oooh, who's that guy over there? 

Um, that's Cayden, replied Rena, glancing his direction, desperately trying to resurface her recent memories that'd been buried under the old. 

She remembered being pulled from the ash, remembered Cayden pulling her up, Allegra covering her with a cloak. Remembered that feeling of utter disorientation as the eyes of many had stared at her, the chaos, the fighting--

And the voice. This voice. It'd been with her when she'd woken, just as confused and disoriented as she was. 

Do you have any idea what you are? asked Rena. Are you something from the portal? 

How am I supposed to know? replied the voice. I just remember being awake once, long ago. Colours and shapes, blurry things. Then everything went dark for a long time. Then the darkness, well, it didn't go away, but I woke up, and I found you. It squealed excitedly. But now I can see! I can see, uh, Cayden! That was it! I can see Cayden! 

Rena grabbed her head. The last of her memories were settling back into place in reverse order. Her earliest memories now flashed behind her eyes, right up until the images faded to darkness. Yet the darkness continued to settle, like they were also memories, memories that just didn't have pictures. 

Realisation struck Rena like she was tethered to a lightning elemental. 

"Rena?" called Cayden, approaching her carefully. "Are you okay?" 

"Cayden!" She offered him a smile that didn't reflect a fraction of the joy holding the rest of her emotions hostage. "I remember. I remember everything."

His face broke into relief. "That's... that's..." He shook his head. "You know what's going on at the portal? Do you remember that?" 

"Djinn on a power trip, Order using chaotics that just broke free because of the spectre possessing the oracle?" said Rena, her memories confirmed with a nod. "Then I remember."

"Do you feel any... different?" he asked. 

"Er, you could say that," said Rena. "Nazine revived me, right?" 

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