All you need is love

Im sorry

*caitlin's POV*

I had avoided twitter for the past two days. I knew that jay had been on, but I avoided the topic of his fans every time it came up. The management had said to just pretend it had never happened and hope it would blow over soon, so that wasn't of much help. They had obviously done their best to keep it out of papers and magazines but not everything could be stopped. My brothers still wont talked to me. They've sort of been busy, so we haven't had many opportunities to talk properly anyway. Jay took away all of the sharp objects in my house, go figure. I argued with him for a while saying that I wasn't a baby and that I could keep away from them. He just said that I hadn't succeeded earlier, so why would I know. I just cried and he felt guilty. He still took them away. I felt like a kid being punished. It was horrible. In order to avoid all media, I hadn't been watching TV or been on the computer. I was really desperate to go outside for a walk, and I decided that would be a good idea. Not many people recognized me anyways, unless I was with one of the boys.

It was refreshing just walking around mindlessly. I wasn't exactly paying attention to where I was going. I was just walking. I looked around to see if I knew where I was and I recognized the place. It was about an hour walk away from my house. I didn't feel tired, but I turned back deciding I should head home since it was getting dark. I spaced out for most of the walk home and I was surprised when I walked into my house to see Mia sitting on the couch.

'Where were you?' she asked, a slight tinge of annoyance in her voice.

'I was out for a much needed walk,' I said before plopping down beside her.

'For two hours?' she asked.

'Yeah, I needed to clear my head,' I answered.

'Just bring your phone next time hun,' she said. I knew she wouldn't go all motherly on me and lecture me about going out. She knew I wouldn't do anything that stupid.

There was a knock on the door and I went to open it.

'Oh hey boys,' I said a bit awkwardly.

'Hey, we should probably talk,' they said.

'Maybe,' I said, not exactly sure if that was a good idea.

'More like We need to apologize,' Ian said looking at Daniel.

'We can talk in my room,' I said before closing the front door as they had already stepped in and we went to my room.

'Were sorry for yelling at you. We were just so worried and just want you to stop hurting yourself. It isn't helping you at all. I am not going to get into that, because I know jay and Mia have both talked to you about that,' Daniel said. He was correct. Mia and me had had a serious conversation about it. She could relate to me since she had once cut herself. Granted she tried to do a lot more than just leave a scar on her skin, she still knew what was going through my mind and hers when we bring the blade to our skin. Jay has talked to me about it several times, obviously. I gestured for Daniel to continue and he did.

'I guess I was a little surprised and I didn't know how to deal with it well. I just needed some time to think it through. I'm so sorry Caitlin,' he said, his eyes brimming with tears. I didn't answer, instead I just leaned over to hug Daniel.

'I still don't get why you fainted caitlin, cutting shouldn't make that happen,' Ian said, a wave of confusion crossing his face.

'Yeah, a combination of losing some blood from that and skipping my breakfast and lunch that day may have been a part of that,' I said.

'You have been eating properly since then right?' he asked.

'Yeah I guess,' I said, 'How have the fans been since the twitcam?'

'Most of them are just asking questions, they are just confused,' Ian said before sighing a bit.

'I guess I should clear that up?' I said, saying it as more of a question than a statement.

'Maybe we should do a group twitcam where we can sort of simplify it so they wouldn't ask more questions,' Daniel suggested.

'Yeah I guess so,' I replied. I sighed again and leaned against Ian's chest