Dearest, In My Memories | JAECHAN

five.

Dear Jaeyoon,

2:06 A.M. — You woke me an hour ago as you opened the door to my bedroom. No, you weren't being sneaky. That door creak is no joke! (And also, I was just starting to fall asleep... so, uhm, oopsie? I really need to sleep earlier now that I have a job... don't tell Bin I was awake, please.)

I have you here at my side with your face tucked into the crook of my neck, so it's kind of awkward the way I'm managing to write, but it's no big deal. Your eyes were all puffed, stress straining at your gaze. I'm getting worried by the day, Jae. I'd be lying if I said I thought you returned in tip-top shape. What's going on? Talk to me... please?

You're stirring slightly in your sleep, so I think that's my cue to stop writing and sleep myself. To snuggle you as close as I can- oh, that's your hand gripping my waist, tugging me closer. Oh, man. You have no idea how you make me feel.

9:37 A.M. — You took the day off today, and it pains me to leave you all alone in our home. I trust you'll sleep in, but you're an unpredictable one since you were already sliding down your finger against the countertops to show off the dust that plastered onto your skin.

You made breakfast for me, protesting against my own cooking when I was already prepping. You grabbed me by the shoulders and dragged me to the table to take a seat.

You said, and I quote, "Not happening today! You shall be fed by," pointing the spatula at yourself, "me."

And you skipped away to the stove.

You're cute. You know that? (You're going to fight me on this and say my cheeks are so squeezable even though I think yours are more. You dote on me a lot, but I think I dote on you just as much.)

You know, every time I look at you, I just sigh. Not in a disappointing type of way, but all my mind thinks is "I love you."

11:09 A.M. — It's so slow at work today. Youngkyun stopped by since he wants to get a pastry for Taeyang when he returns from his road trip tomorrow. That reminds me Juho and Seokwoo will be having their meetup soon. Oh boy. I really hope it goes well for them.

Youngkyun dragged me all throughout the shop, which Youngbin facepalmed and laughed at. He just wanted an opinion on all the desserts to know which he should pick for Taeyang.

To which I said, "Just get him his favorite."

And he looked at me as if I had said the most groundbreaking thing, his eyes wide as if he had seen a ghost. "Why didn't I think of that sooner!" He grinned so wide. "You're a genius."

I facepalmed.

Now I know how the two of us must've looked to Youngbin. Maybe.

12:59 P.M — I wonder what you're up to. I wonder if you've decided to crawl back into bed and sprawl yourself against the disheveled bed sheets, letting out a yawn or a moan as you succumb to your exhaustion. Or, if you decided to do housework and drag your body across the entire house with whichever cleaning tool you so desire to use. I wonder if I'll come home to a squeaky clean house, or if I'll come to you having made dinner after a nap. I wonder what we'll have for dinner, now that I think about it.

1:06 P.M. — As I said, it's very slow today. I bet it's because of the rain. I do suppose it was pretty cloudy when I clocked in earlier after you dropped me off, but I didn't think it'd actually pour. There's not a singular ounce of sunshine cracking through the clouds. Pitch dark as it pours.

As long as there's no thunder... I'll be okay.

I'm currently eating my lunch, sitting by the window. Youngbin's sitting across me, and again, he says hi.

Youngbin told me how this lady asked for his number while he was grocery shopping yesterday. It fascinates me how people find such courage to go up to a person you may not know and ask for their number. I'd get uncomfortable with that, but... I guess I can understand it too if you find the person really attractive.

He was telling me how he got really awkward and laughed it off, telling her how he's not interested in a relationship right now. She got so embarrassed and ran off. Personally, I would've just said I was dating someone, but you know Youngbin... he finds it hard to lie.

Oh- that was lightning. Great! Uhm!

3:22 P.M. — We're closing shop early. The weather isn't good. We only had Youngkyun come in when it wasn't this bad and we had like one other person come in as well. Man, the forecast didn't say anything about the weather getting like this. Is it just as bad over there?

Youngbin may drive me home, and he'll probably have to stay over for the night. I'll text you soon... writing this as a reminder for myself.

5:00 P.M. — You and Youngbin are just cackling away in the kitchen as you guys cook dinner. I wanted to help too, but you simply booped my nose and smiled, telling me to take a break since I'm the one who cooks the most out of the two of us.

I don't know why the boop made me so flustered. Lately, it's been so... I don't even know how to describe it... with you. Like, we've been together for so long already, yet my heart's racing and the butterflies are fluttering. I just keep falling for you more and more.

My hand's getting tired, will continue tomorrow,

Chanhee