Team8s and Counting

116. Apparently it Doesn't Even Matter...

She got out her phone, and sent a picture of her postpartum stomach. Usually, she never liked to send pictures of her bump, but this was a colleague she felt comfortable doing so with. It took less then a minute for her to write back.

Sick C-section scar!

Barf Bag smiled, sending a text back.

Thanks, it was quite the labor I tell you,

It didn't take long for her to get a response back:

Man, I wish I had a C-section that early. That's two months less of carrying around a baby and as a bonus you don't have to push like your life depends on it.

Barfy tried to laugh it off, sending back yet another text.

I guess I didn't then.

It was only a matter of two seconds before she started to break down again. Instead of making things better, she was only starting to have more negative thoughts flood her mind.

Is a C-section cheating? Is having twins at 32 weeks lucky?

She started to feel like all that she went through wasn't even valid anymore. All the hard morning sickness and the chaos of her pregnancy was nothing to her colleague, all her body endured during the C-section was just...taking the easy way out.

Barf Bag lay back on her bed, the tears streaming down her face. She felt utterly defeated and invalidated, as if her struggles and pain were somehow less significant.

Donut, hearing her tears from the nursery, immediately ran into their room, "Barfy! What happed?"

Barf Bag turned back at him, "Go away, you won't understand."

Donut sighed, knowing that she was partially right, "I know I will never underswtand, but can I at least try to-"

"GO AWAY!" Barf Bag screamed. She quickly took a deep breath and calmed down, "I...I don't wanna talk about it right now."

Donut respected her wishes and walked out of her room, but he wasn't going to just let her struggle on her own like that. He saw Needle walking up the stairs, a smile on her face.

"Hey Donut!" She said, "Is there anything I can do to help out with the nursery?"

Donut sighed, "Actually...would you go check on Barfy, she's in our room."

Needle looked concerned, "Is she okay?"

Donut shook his head, "She wouldn't let me talk to her. She needs...somone who actually get's it."

Needle was confused, "...get what exactly."

Donut shook his head, "Just...go check on her. It will make more sense I promise."

Needle tilted her head, "Okay?" She walked towards Barf Bag's room, her crys becoming more and more clear. When she got there, she cracked open the door and stuck her head in.

"Barfy?" She said calmly, "It everything okay?"

Barf Bag looked up at Needle, "...apperently having a C-section is cheating."

Needle knew instantly that that wasn't true, "Who told you that."

Barf Bag face planted into her pillow, continuing to let out more of her tears. Needle wasn't having it though, and wanted to know who was getting those thoughts into her head.

"WHO. SAID. THAT!" She said, raising her voice.

Barf Bag sighed, lifting her head from her pillow. "One of my colleagues."

It didn't take long for Needle to snap, "Oh fuck them!" she said, the anger in her voice present.

Barf Bag's voice continued to quiver, "But...it-it's true r-right? You had to push out a child without anything to stop the pain. I just got knocked up with meds and had them taken out of me by someone else."

Needle shook her head, "That was all my choice, Barf Bag. I had control over my own body at the moment. You didn't. You did what was best for you and the babies, and that makes you a damn good mother." Needle sat down on the bed next to Barf Bag, her tone softening. "You carried those twins for 32 weeks. You went through the ups and downs of pregnancy, just like Pin did, just like Saw did, just like I did, and just like that mother fucking colleague of yours. You had to rush to the hospital in labor, knowing that you're twins were 8 weeks premature. You made it through a C-section, which is major surgery. None of that is easy. None of it is cheating."

Barf Bag sniffled, wiping her tears with the back of her hand. "I just feel like I didn't do enough. Like I took the easy way out."

Needle looked down at Barf Bag's scar, "That is a sign of a fucking warrior. If I had to let someone else rip Dimey out of me...I don't know how I would have handled it. You hadeled it like a fucking champion, Barf Bag, and you and I can both agree that it was anything but easy."

Barf Bag felt her heart rate start to slow down a little bit, taking deep breaths to ease her nerves.

Needle placed a hand on her shoulder, "And it's not even close to over for you. I'm assuming that scar still hurts like a bitch.

Barf Bag nodded, her voice barely above a whisper. "Yeah, it does."

Needle gave her a sympathetic look. "See? You're still fighting. You're still healing. And you're doing it all while taking care of your babies. That's nothing short of heroic."

Barf Bag let out a shaky breath, feeling a bit of the burden lift. "Thank you, Needle. I really needed to hear that."

Needle smiled warmly. "Anytime, Barfy. We're all in this together." Needle raised her arm, "And if anyone makes you feel otherwise, they can answer to me."

Barf Bag managed a small laugh, feeling the warmth of Needle's words seep into her. "I'll keep that in mind."

The two of them sat in comfortable silence for a few moments, the tension in the room slowly dissipating. Needle then stood up, offering her hand to Barf Bag.

"Come on," Needle said. "Let's go downstairs and join the others. You don't have to go through this alone."

Barf Bag and Needle headed downstairs, where they were greeted by the rest of the team. After Barf Bag had explained what was going on, the others made sure she knew that she was strong as hell. Pin and Saw also told her that what she did, none of them could have imagined going through.

Barf Bag was grateful for the support of the team, and knew that they we're going to make some of the best aunties and uncles for their little Sprinkle and Sack.

.......................................................

Barf Bag has been through enough shit in this book, that colleague of her's didn't need to make things more difficult. Thank goodness for our Needle, she can be snappy at times but ultimately she's just the best badass ever. As someone who's gotten surgery about a month and a half ago, it's fucking hard, and it is far from the easy way out.

Also, we have officially hit 25K reads! Like I've done at the other 10K milestones,  you will get some more fan-children drawings, this time of Sprinkle and Sack. The more you read, the sooner you'll get them!

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and I'll see you in the next chapter!

- Sunny