Stagnant Soars - poetry

am I okay

sometimes I lay in bed and stare at the ceiling

I ask myself why am I still here

I don't want to go

but I don't see the point in being here

I want to turn to alcohol even though I don't drink

because maybe that'll make me forget

or ease the lack of feeling

I can't cry, I can't laugh

I zone out like I'm cut in half

I cant get out of bed

and I don't want to

I prefer to just not exist

and become one with the darkness

I try to hang on

but for what

it isn't for me

so I may as well cut

- moonie