Stagnant Soars - poetry

no longer in the dark

its weird

not being in the shadows of my own mind

I still have horrible tendencies and often fall back into old mind sickening habits

but for the most part, I am okay

as odd as it sounds to say out loud

genuinely

i am okay

sometimes I miss that dark feeling

the one I used to find comfort in

when I would sob on the bathroom floor with heavy breaths waiting for the emotions to go away

but instead they crept up my neck and took away my ability to exist

i miss forcing myself to find comfort in my own skin

hugging my body and telling myself to breathe

repeatedly reassuring that I'm okay even though I know that I am not

being too scared to reach out

muffling my sadness

and suppressing every ounce of emotion shown

i went through it alone and can only really thank myself for getting through it

i know I had some help along the way

but at the end of the day, im still here because of me

im no longer in the dark

and I may miss it

but it is nice to finally see me again

- moonie