Lavender haze

Chapter 15

"Hey kitten." Jimin  turned around to find yoongi  in the kitchen, pouring some alcohol on a glass. "What do you want to drink?"

"I'm not drinking tonight." He informed, making yoongi raise his eyebrows.

"Whaaat? But what's a party without alcohol?" Hoseok  whined, getting up and grabbing jimin  from the shoulder. "You have to relax a bit, mate. Let's have a shot."

"Hoseok hyung , I won't drink." He rolled his eyes as his hyung dragged him to the kitchen and pulled out 3 shot glasses.

"Why not?"

"I don't want to."

That was a lie.

He did want to, he liked alcohol and he wanted to have a good time with his friends.

But what would happen with his self-restraint ?

He feared that he let himself be carried away, with yoongi .

Because he knew that his mind did not work properly when there was alcohol in his system, he remembered the feeling when he was with yoongi  last time.

The need to be close, to touch him, to devour him.

"C'mon, just a bit. Enough to make you happy and take that frown away from your pretty face." Hoseok  pressed his index on the middle of jimin's  eyebrows, making him sigh.

"I don't want to,hobi  hyung "

Hoseok rolled his eyes and nodded, taking his glass and leaving to the sofas.

Jimin watched him drown it on his way there, landing on top of Namjoon  accidentally and falling to the ground.

"Is it because of me?" Yoongi's voice brought him out of his daze.

"What?" He turned around to find the boy talking to him genuinely, this time without smirks or bratty comments.

"Are you not drinking because you fear I'll do something to you?"

That was part of the reason, but he knew he could make yoongi stop if he wanted to in a moment like that.

The problem was that he wouldn't want to.

"Kinda." He replied, crossing his arms.

It surprised him that yoongi looked somewhat regretful or confused.

"You can drink if you want to. I won't try anything with you as long as you're drunk."

It was jimin's  time to get confused, raising an eyebrow in the older's  direction.

"Yeah well, I don't believe you."

"I'm serious, jimin ." The way he was talking seemed like it, as if he wanted jimin  to believe him. "I would never do anything to you that you didn't want."

It was hard to take in those words.

Firstly, because yoongi  was being sincere, he even turned off his bratty self to make sure jimin  knew.

And secondly, because jimin  knew it was true. And if it was true, that would mean that everything that had happened, yoongi's  touches, his words, the handjob, jimin wanted him to do all that.

Or at least, he didn't stop him from doing it.

And deep inside, he knew it was because he felt good.

He knew that if he had told yoongi to stop seriously, or if he had pushed him away, he would've let him.

So it was even harder to think that it was his fault.

"Jimin?" Yoongi called, seeing that he had been looking at the same spot for a few minutes and wasn't answering.