Match Made In Hell || ongoing

Chapter 33~ Soft spot

Not edited at all i can't even lie

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Valencia Morana

Merry fucking Christmas I guess.

I watch as the blade of this dagger shines when the sunlight hits it from all the open windows in the room, then slowly my eyes fall to Alessio laying in bed with tubes attached to needles taped on his arms and a nasal cannula giving him a supply of air as he sleeps in his medically endured sleep for two days now.

When I got back from the mall they had brought him here and had him resting since, he hasn't woken up. If the world decides to give back to me after all it's put me through he won't wake up.

The phone Nikolai got and shoved in my face the other day rings and I pick it up, getting up from the couch and walking over to the windows as I put the phone to my ear and smile when I hear Ajax's voice.

"How are you doing?" I ask about his bullet wound and he groans into the phone, "it feels like someone drove a car over my body." He mutters and I let out a small chuckle before bringing the dagger up and looking at it.

The sharp point glistening in the sun as snow falls slowly from the sky and onto the ground, "how are you? What happened when Wyatt took you?" He asks and I freeze. I never told them about what Wyatt did, and I never will. Not again. Amara only knew that they hurt me when she stayed that one night but nothing else.

I can't have them tiptoeing around me for months again, that's what happened when this shit happened before. And this time I'm fine, it's not bad. No you're not, any second you're not thinking of something you feel their hands on you. You think you don't need help but that's no where close to the truth.

Whatever

"Nothing much, I'm already healed from that kidnapping." I tell him and he hums like he doesn't believe me. Because you're lying. "Merry Christmas," he whispers after a few seconds of silence and I close my eyes for a second, picturing dad sitting on the ground in front of our Christmas tree and handing us all our presents one by one.

"Merry Christmas," I say back to him and he laughs. "Isn't it crazy how different our lives were 5 years ago?" He asks and nods even though he can't see me, feeling the corners of my lips tilting upwards.

"Your dad making us each what we preferred for Christmas breakfast, opening presents, playing in the snow." He lists what we would be doing if our lives were normal and I just feel a punch in the gut knowing that now officially everything from my dad is gone. The house, the pictures, his clothes, his jewellery and my necklace too now.

All I have are my memories.

I rub my neck lightly as I speak, "the gingerbread house contest, the movies and how we'd make a mess of the kitchen with our cookies and baking." I add onto the list and he laughs.

"Maybe after all this is over we can make our own memories, new memories to put over the painful ones." I tell him hopefully, we could live a new, different life if I can put an end to all this bullshit. Maybe I'll fall in love with someone too?

Maybe I'll have babies one day and all this would just be a sick nightmare in the past.

I imagine myself as a mom and grin, as much as I fear messing up as a parent I know there is no better feeling in the world to be a mommy to a little baby, especially with the one you love most.