My Everything | 3

51~ Take A Walk

𓇚𝐇𝐀𝐙𝐄𝐋𓇚

I could feel my anger and frustration settling in myself, boiling my blood and skin, wanting it to seep right through and grab Kai by the God fucking throat.

That wasn't cool.

Fuck.

My words cut him deep, slicing through a sensitive nerve that I pushed too hard it was starting to leak with pain, unfortunately a small part of me wished I never said that, wished I could take my words back and not say such a nasty thing, not have to stoop to his level to strike some hurt like that.

He didn't say anyhting about my comment but referred to another question, "Why did you call me here, Hazel?" That's when I remembered. My purpose for this visit, the sole reason why I remembered his number after all this, why I called him out here, why I wanted him here, "I didn't call you out here to go get ice cream, you know why I called you here, I don't need to spell it out for you." I couldn't help it, the words kept falling out and my brain couldn't keep up, I wasn't thinking before I was talking, shit was just falling out my mouth.

"I understand your anger." He got up, walking a few steps to stand infront of me, "Why don't we take a walk." He sticks his hand, his gloved hand hangs in the cold air for me to grab and to pretend this was my father all these years, this was the man I looked up to, he took care of me, who loved me, that's what he wanted, he wanted to be like father and daughter...because I had a feeling this would be the last time I would see him too.

I let a fraction of my sanity and strength fall, taking his hand as I pick myself up and wrap my arm around his bicep, holding my...Dad close to me, seeking the comfort I didn't have all these years. "I remember seeing you for the very first time." He spoke after a moment of silence, reminiscing as we walked down the parks dark pathway, guiding us with nothing other than each other, "When your mother told me you were mine I was truly overjoyed..." He trails on leaving his story open ended, "Until she told me we couldn't be together and that she was going to raise you with my brother," There was so much I wanted to say but I kept quiet, this was his moment a part of me didn't want to ruin it.

"I could understand why because she was with him but what gnawed at me the most was her lies, telling Ryan you were his, telling me I was your biological father, it complicated what love was for me and if that was it, I didn't want any part of it so, to replace that hole I resented my brother, his wife, you, he had it all and he didn't even realize that all of it was mine." When I here Kai put it like that, it hurts, it chips away the hatred I have for him piece by piece.

"I wanted to hurt you because I knew it would go through him, I wanted to hurt him so it would effect you. That was my sole purpose this entire time, but, as I started hurting more and causing pain and destruction the closer I was getting the more I could see clearly at what I was doing how I was getting to see more of you and hear you and understand you. I hid in the shadows all these years to torture you just so I could be close to you." Kai sighs, his words becoming a pain even for him.

His words were sickening to anyone who heard this from the outside world would know that this was awful to hear even though he had a point. We do crazy things for the people we love. If only there was someone to love him the same way he loves me.

"Now, our time is finally up and there is nothing that can change me or you in this situation, all we can do is embrace this final moment we share." His words cut right through me, my body started to feel heavy with sadness and pain, something that was never there before, "I know Roman is over at my place, tearing everything apart, trying to find a clue, a reason, something to patch his satisfaction that I'm gone and dead." He was right in every possible way.