The Regretevator writing dump / oneshots (regretefic)

An argument and a chase (wallmark)

"B4H4H4H4H4H- 4h4h4h4h4h3h3h3h3h3h3h3..3h3h....g-gUyz-?"

"Give me the phone." Wallter said boldy 

Infected jolted and gatekeeper the phone in their palm

"N0-!"

"GIVE US THAT DARN PHONE YE DUBIOUS LITTLE SHIT-!" mark spat out, causing infected to say fuck it, and book it to the ikea that they'd landed at

"!!- GET HIM!!!"

And before infected knew it, he had a litteraly mannequin and a blob of brick and concrete running after him, infected took sharp turns and maneuvered through the infinite ikea, while mark struggled to run fast (being a mannequin with one stand and all) he found it it easy to dodge the obstacles while Wallter kept tripping due to his intense speed, infected took it as an opportunity to run through a maze of walls and demo rooms, losing the two in the process.

"Where'd that little devil go!?!?" Mark huffed out as he stopped and kneeled, catching his breath

"I don't know....shit." Wallter muttered and sighed, facepalming.

Infected kept muttering under his breath as he hid behind a large cupboard, trying to contain his sickly cough in between, and almost sneezing until he felt a hand lend him a napkin.

"Th4nkz br4h." He took it and silently ejected his snot and blood before sneezing and slowly looking up.

Thankfully, it was just lampert.

Lampert-

Infected immediately pulled him, forcing lampert to kneel, then he put a hand over his mouth, causing lampert to squirm in disgust

"SHHH....1 c4nt l3t th3m h34r m3h-"

"???? wh-"

Lampert suddenly heard mark exclaim as he continued to search for infected

"INFECTED COME OUT!!! AND I WONT TELL YER FATHER THAT YOU'RE HERE!!! GRRR"

"??? They're looking for you-" lampert whispered as infected removed his mouth, taking this as opportunity to grab a wet wipe to partially wash his head.

"Y3z..Uhm...1m k1nd4 1n 4 b1gg13 rn-"

"What did you do!?"

"Th3y h4d 4n scUffl3 s0 I r3c0rd3d 1t 4z a j0k3- uhm...y34h.."

"What-!? Yeah now I can see why."

"INFECTEDDD!!!! Oooooo once I get my hands on yer."

"Did you check that cupboard mark-?"

"Does it LOOK like he'd fit there???"

"Well maybe he does-! Check!!"

"AURGHH.."

...lampert sighed

"Alright fine. I'll hide you. But you have to delete the video and never pull this shit again understood!?"

Infected rolled his eyes, lampert really sounded like unpleasant right now

"F111nn33"

"Good." Lampert got up, made it look like he just stumbled across them

"!!- lampert-!?"

"Oh! Mark! Good to see you..is anything wrong-?"

He waved him off "Nah it's alright son. Just some...business"

Wallter pushed him off "actually, we're trying to find infected."

Lampert tilted his head "oh? What for?"