Beach Babe | The Outsiders | Johnny Cade

| No | 46 |

I walked out of the bathroom to find Jesse gone. I told him to wait right here! What part of that does he not understand? I pushed through the crowd of angry Chicago fans and happy San Antonio fans. I was scared I would get trampled if I didn't find Jesse soon. I can't believe he left! I told him specifically not to.

I got a few feet away from the exit when I was yanked out of the crowd, I turned to see who it was, Jesse. "Where the hell were you! I told you to wait!"

"Where was I? Where were you! I went back to find you and were gone. I saw my favorite player and was getting him to sign my ball."

"I almost got trampled in that crowd!"

He rolls his eyes "Jesus you're so dramatic Stacy." I sigh, I guess he's right, meeting his favorite playing is a pretty rare thing. I am being dramatic. "Wanna see what I got him to put on it?" He holds out the baseball to me and I take it

I turn it over in my hands and see the players signature and 'S. G. + J. S.' Written beneath it. "Aw that's so cute!" I hug him. He got our initials on it? He must love me!

He squeezes me "I'll never forget today Teddy bear."

"Me either."

    I start shaking the second I see our initials on that stupid fucking ball. It gets ten time worse when I turn it over and see a new message on it 'Hey teddy bear, how's Oklahoma been?' My stomach drops so hard I'm not even sure if it's still in my body. I hear talking around me but can't make out what's being said. The only thing my brain can comprehend is that this ball was with Jesse last time I saw it. He had to be the one to throw it, he had to be the one to find my house. He knows where I live.

     My migraine gets worse immediately. My vision in my left eyes is pretty much completely distorted and wrong. I feel like I'm on the ledge of a 200 foot tower, the air unbreathable, me being off balance, and the feeling like I could die at any moment.

My hearing returns and I hear several people calling my name, each time in ricochets around my brain "I'm fine." I drop the ball on the ground.

Theo puts a hand on my shoulder "Stacy I know you aren't"

I step back "Don't touch me. I'm fine. Just get the window fixed." The spot he touched feels like it's burning.

"Do you really think it's a good idea-" Soda peaks through the broken window

"Fix the damn window." My voice cracks "Please."

    There's an uncomfortable silence as the boys continue to work on the window, occasionally glancing at me with worried looks. I can't feel anything. I'm not sad or mad, I just don't feel anything. It's odd.

    Darry finally gets the widow out of the wall and Two-But and Soda help him get the new one in. After a few minutes he pulls the new one out and leans out the hole "I need to go back to my place and get the sealant for around the window, I still have some from when ours cracked and water got in."

"Okay. If you need any more or a different kind I can go grab some." I barely even recognize my own voice. It's shaky and has no emotion in it. The migraine really isn't helping. It's almost like being drunk, I feel like I'm watching my body do stuff but I don't know if I'm really the one doing it. I wish I was drunk.

"I shouldn't, thanks for the offer though." I nod "Alright I'm heading back to get it, who's coming with me?" Everyone apparently, well except Me, Theo, and Johnny.

   They turn down the corner and I knew they were going to be talking about me. I didn't care. I don't care about anything right now. I would say it's scaring me but I can't feel right now. Theo looks like he's on the verge of tears and frankly so does Johnny. We stand there in silence for what feels like eternity. I'm about to just go inside when a mustang swerves down the road and pulls over on the curb in front of the house.