Tu manchi (You are missing to me)

Chapter Five

I open my eyes. There's a white ceiling. I hear many voices around me. But none of them is familiar. Those are unfamiliar voices to me. I can't possibly get myself up. There's something heavy on my stomach. It's him. Steven.

His head is on my stomach. He's sleeping. I try not to move but he wakes up.

"You okay , Eva?" he said. There was worry , guilt and love in his voice.

"Where am I? Where are we?" I said I was unable to process what happened to me.

"Hospital. You fainted in the farm. Maybe it's the sun or you were not feeling that well to come outside with me. I'm sorry." His hand is now on my face. His eyes are sad.

"Oh ! I must have been tired from my work. Don't you worry about it. You have nothing to do with my health. Don't be guilty for nothing."

"No."

"Let's go home." I cut him and stand up from the bed.

"If you want to! Just wait right here."
He's talking to the doctor over there. I am staring at his face. His face is different from when we were in farm. It was bright but now it's gloomy. His eyes are not sparkling anymore.

"Let's go Bella." He said holding my hand.

I am sitting next to him in the passenger seat.

"Eva." He paused for a thought . Maybe he's thinking if it will be okay to ask something right now or not.

"Are you still getting those attacks?"

He's looking at the road. I am looking at him , not knowing what to say. If I should lie or tell him the truth that yes I am freaking getting attacks , I am suffering from sleepless nights which exists even for 2 weeks in a row. Sleeping pills are not of any use as well. But again , if he'll be alright to know I'm not okay.

"No !" I just said no.

He's silent. Then for the whole journey we were silent. He pulled the car in front of his house. We went inside.

STEVEN'S POV ....

I knew that she's lying. But I was wondering why is she lying to me. She don't want to discuss her problems with me anymore. The thoughts were flooding my mind. But I was silent. I don't want to pressurise her to tell me if she's not comfortable.

But I'm worried about her. The doctor told me that at this rate she's not gonna survive. She's suffering from way too many and consecutive attacks. Her mind is not performing well in this case. She can't figure out how to get out of this. She's suffering and don't want to discuss it with anyone which is bad for her mental health. She should get out of this or she would die from this suffocation. She needs to love someone. She must allow someone to come closer to her and start a new life , leaving her past traumas behind. Yeah , trauma.

That douchebag Ross. He's the sole reason she's going through this all. It was actually the around the first year of the college. We were friends. They fell in love , both of them with each other. Even though , I liked her as well , I just didn't want to ruin my friendship with her.

They were happy with each other, even more than happy. They started to live together after their half anniversary. They were most loveable and ideal couple of the college. After one year , he raped her. He had a sex with her without her willingness. She's traumatized. She was in her worst state. She called me. Out of all her friends , she called me. I went there. I was shouting her name.

"Eva !  Eva! Where are you? Eva !"
I was worried about her as she was crying way too much at the call.

I found her in the corner of her bedroom. She's afraid. Her condition is indescribable. She was sitting on the floor , conjusted in a small space. She's crying. She's having difficulty in her breathing. She's holding onto her knees. She was shivering. Her body is trembling out of fear and confusion.