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Short Story Competition 2024 [CLOSED]

Short Story

If anyone wants to have a fun challenge, they can join this competition! A prompt and minimum word amount will be decided and constructive criticism will be given. A winner will be chosen, but please remember, this is all just for fun and writing pr...

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Entry 5 - 𝑪𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒊𝒄𝒊𝒔𝒎

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by SallyWriter123

by SallyWriter123

Author: Lizzy

Genres: Romance, start's a bit Adventure-related

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Throughout the story, especially first and second paragraphs, there are a lot of sentences starting with 'she'. In my opinion it could've been written in a better variety of ways rather than being too repetitive. It doesn't make the story flow as nicely.

I feel like the story is kind of rushed, there are a lot of time skips in the story and the story sounds very 'to the point', but if the story was intended to be made up of only around 600 words I understand how it can be hard when you want to put in a lot of scenes to make the story progress. I do struggle with this part of writing short stories myself at times.

To me personally, the last line doesn't sound too romantic. This is not a proper criticism but just an opinion. If I would ask a guy out, I would want him to say something sweet and not that you never know until you try. But that's just me lol!

The ideas are nice and I love a good romance, but I feel like the execution could've been somewhat better, although I do understand that it could have something to do with the time limit that was given.

Thank you so much for entering! <3

SallyWriter :)