My Mafia King (mxm)

Chapter 18

Igor

Nobody can even imagine how I am feeling right now. The one person with whom I wanted to share my whole life with broke my heart into a million pieces. The words that came out from Caesar's mouth stabbed me a thousand times.

I don't know when I started loving him, maybe in our childhood days when I used to protect him, care for him or when just give a simple smile to me. Maybe I have always loved him more than a brother or friend. He was always in my heart, it's just that I didn't look deeper into those feelings of mine for him.

The moment he confessed to me was the time when I was confident about my own feelings. The spark that was between us was reignited again and thought that from now on we'll be together forever... But I forgot, this is life and not a fairytale.

I was just lying down with no ounce of sleep when Caesar walked out of my room. The emotions that were flowing in his eyes showed how badly he is sorry for the words he said and I was just one step away from hugging him... but I knew we both needed time.

The next day when I woke up, the sun was shining brightly through my window but there was no brightness in my life. I did my morning routine and got ready for the day.

"Good morning Igor, how is your hand?" Rose asked as soon as I stepped into the dining area.
"Good morning ma'am, it's better" I said with head down and without any further conversation I sat on the vacant chair.

After eating breakfast, I walked into my office and started working. It must have been an hour only when doors opened without a knock and knew who entered.
"You are working when you are injured?" Caesar stopped in front of the table while my eyes were still focused on the files.
"It's just a cut, nothing major" and started working again without acknowledging his presence. I know he was getting frustrated but still watched me working for 10 mins straight.
"Igor, I am sorry for whatever I said. I didn't mean anything... it was just my anger...Pls baby forgive me" the voice I heard was so broken and sad, that I looked at Caesar and saw tears flowing from his eyes. I was itching to go and take him in my arms but still stood my ground and continued my work.

When I didn't respond to him, he walked out of the room after wiping his tears. And the moment the door closed I broke down, tears continuously rolled down from my eyes. After getting my breathing rate and emotions back to normal, I walked out.

"Igor!" Someone called me from behind and I looked back to see Lion standing there with an expression that I never saw on his face 'disappointment'.
"Yes sir?" I politely said with my head down. He walked towards me and stood in front of me with both hands in his pocket.
"I want to talk to you. Come with me" He said and started walking towards his study room.

"You know I never got a father's love. The care, protection, guidance and affection a father gives to his son... I never got that" He sat on his chair while I just stood in front of his table and looked at him blankly when he said those words.
"I know you are confused as to why I am suddenly saying all these things... but pls just listen to me" He looked directly at me and I just nodded.
"I thought that there is no such thing like a happy family in this world. The way my parents used to fight or my father beating my mother in front my eyes and sometimes even me... He was never a good man or even a father. I always feared that I might become like him because at the end I do have his blood" Tears were dripping from his eyes but he still composed himself.

"But then, Rozlina came into my life and brought brightness along with her. She became my life... my love. She took me out from those dark memories and showed care, love and a new world to me... Again, my whole world changed when I became a father. You know, the whole time when Roz was pregnant I was panicking and she was the one who took care of me when vice versa should be done" He chuckled while thinking about those memories.
"And finally the day came, I became a father. Now, I was supposed to carry a role that I despised of my whole life... The time I walked into that room, my heart was beating at a fast rate but Roz held my hand and gave a squeeze with a sweet smile. She then gave Caesar in my arms... and the time I held him I promised myself that I will never be like my father... I will always be there for him. He will get all my attention, love, care and whatever he wants... He will forever be my son" Till now both of us were crying while giving space to each other.

For few minutes nobody spoke anything, we both just looked at anything except for each other.
"The way I care about Caesar and Alexei, is the same for you as well Igor. The time we got you from your home was the day we decided that you will always be our son. No matter what happens, we will never abandon you... you are part of us" He walked towards my chair where I was seated the whole time.
"I know you both love each other... And I am so happy to know about this. Now, you will not be able to leave us" He said with a little smile on his face.
"He loves you alot... He is fucking crazy for you. My son can die for you Igor, you mean that much to him... Pls forgive him for his stupidity, pls" Lion caressed my head when the whole time my head was down and I was not able to stop my tears.

"I love him too, Lion. I love him so fucking much... It's just I am really very hurt with whatever he said... I don't know, what to do" I poured my feelings to him.
"I am not telling you to not punish him but just try to talk it out...He is breaking from inside Igor, my son needs you as much as you need him" He hugged me tightly and gave a kiss on my forehead.

'I am yours Caesar'...