Us. | A Joe Jonas FanFiction | Book 3

forty.

Unable to press back at the pressure once again building in my chest, the tears finally releasing from my eyes as I double over. The ache in my chest gets stronger, a cry releasing from my mouth causing my hand to fly up to cover it, the fear of Joe hearing me creeping into my mind.

After a moment, I sniffle for the last time, forcing myself to stand up straight again and wash my hair and body, a random tear falling here and there but ultimately stopping by the time I step out of the shower and dry off, pulling on my clothes and beginning to take the rest of Joe's time to put on some light makeup and do my hair. Things may not be so great in my marriage, but I'll be damned if anyone knows that. At least not today.

By the time I'm done, I move downstairs to see Joe putting Willa in the bassinet, indicating she's already down for her second nap of the day. I enter the kitchen, beginning to prepare myself some lunch while Joe exits the living room, moving upstairs to I assume shower and get ready himself. With the Jonas Christmas Eve party to attend, I'm not sure he'd be going to do anything else.

The party would be a little different this year, Kevin and Danielle agreeing to make it earlier in the day so that Joe and I can spend Christmas Eve at home. We had agreed upon  months ago, wanting to begin our own traditions with Willa separately.

We'll go, all hang out and relax, and then Joe and I will return home with Willa. If we're still doing as we planned, I assume we'll go for a walk to look at Christmas lights before returning home, reading her 'Twas the Night Before Christmas, and put her to bed. Will she be up for her 3 am feeding? Of course. But I guess that just means I'll be able to be the first to tell her Merry Christmas for the first time.

Arriving to Kevin and Danielle's as Willa's second nap ends, I climb into the back seat, feeding and changing her before getting out of the car with her in my arms, Joe immediately taking her from my arms and leading us to the front door.

I gulp, licking my lips. Here we go.

We're greeted with all the excitement and love, Joe faking a smile the moment the door opens, forcing me to do the same. This isn't exactly the mood I was expecting for our first Christmas with Willa, but it's what we have.

After a while of Willa being passed around and played with, she ends up in Denise's lap, laughing away at Alena and Valentina who are consistently playing around with Willa's laugh being the goal.

"So, how's it going?" Dani asks, walking over to me as I sit at the counter on one of the stools, space between me and the rest of the family.

"Meaning?" I ask, a grin on my face.

She gives me a look before continuing, softly. "Kevin and I had some problems after Alena, too."

My frown fades a bit, looking down before raising my eyes to her again, giving her a small smile. "I'm not sure we're going through the same."

"I'm sure it feels worse," she says, sighing. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

I shake my head, grinning at her. "I don't think so, no. But I really appreciate the offer."

She nods, staying nearby as she prepares a few more snacks on the counter, filling the trays that are mostly gone by now.

"Dani?" I ask softly.

"Hm?" She hums, getting closer so I won't have to talk so loud.

"How'd you know?"

She sighs. "Well, for one, Joe is typically the one to constantly ask if you need anything or if you're okay. He hasn't the entire time the two of you have been here. Nor has there been any affection shown between the two of you. I'm sure everyone else sees it as you two still adjusting to having a baby and learning how to balance time for her and time for one another but as someone who's been there, I see you."