Judgment

Chapter 6: i like her--- as a friend

(Jay's POV)

Survivor series closes in and the nervousness  starts to set in. But all my fears are put to rest when I think. I destroyed 3 main event superstars all on my own. But once again I got the jump on them and one of them is injured. But nonetheless I guess that is something to be proud of. By some miracle Seth Rollins is allowed to compete at survivor series after the ass whooping I handed out to him on raw. I got to hand it to him he is one resilient bastard, like the guy is one slight crack away from the end of his career but he still completes in matches. I can respect that. If anything ever happens to me I still wanna wrestle. Hell even if it kills me.

After me and Drew got back from the gym we met up with the judgment day. Drew told me how much he hated them and how he thought they were completely useless. I mean we just have to agree to disagree here man. out of the ring drew was a nice guy always smiling cracking jokes. But the moment he steps through those ropes he becomes a man possessed. A whole side to my own cousin which I barley ever saw before. Both me and him hellbent on revenge against the bloodline

Anything to do with clash at the castle completely fucks me up. To see my cousin get cheated out of his big moment in Front of the fans is one thing and the 2nd one which is about 10000x worse than the other is all I can think about was Abby's death not long after I returned from Cardiff. Some part of me wonders that if I stayed back home that she would've did it. Everyone around me told me I shouldn't blame myself.

(Flashback, September 2022)

"It's All my fault! ITS ALL MY FUCKING FAULT." "I SHOULD BE THE ONE IN THE GRAVE NOT HER." I yelled out as I lose my shit punching walls and throwing things. I smashed my headset. "Mate don't blame yourself theres nothing you could've done you were out of the country. You know how fucked her life was, she told me that you were why she kept going and I guess her depression got thr better of her one day." Alex said over the playstation party chat. He was wrong

I just shouldn't have left, I knew she was suicidal and I fucking left. I'm way beyond an idiot I'm the most stupid person in the motherfuckig multiverse. I know he's trying to help but fuck I think he knows it isn't exactly the truth he was saying. "Mate you still there." Alex asked me. I then texted him

Alex: yo what happened

Jay: smashed my headset

Alex: should I come over

Jay: I wouldn't but fuck it if you want

Alex: ok on my way, don't drink its not gonna make shit better it will probably make it worse

Jay: you're a bit late I already have

Alex: ok man

Well my life is a fucking mess I lost the love of my life. My best friend feels like he has a responsibility to make me feel better. I appreciate his effort but shit I'm just completely ruined. I cancelled all my upcoming matches and was taking some time off. I know I shouldn't lose all hope but to be honest I'm not exactly sure where to go from here, although I don't intend on my time out of the ring being too long as wrestling numbs all the pain. Well mentally at least, wrestling is physically demanding especially my style of just absolutely losing my shit and throwing myself off ladders. I'm hooked on the adrenaline I get from doing it. But with Abby dying I'm just fucking out of it mentally like if I was put in that ring right now I would have my ass handed to me.