A Court of Shadows and Chaos (Azriel fanfic)

Chapter 19

Morana's pov

The melody of an exquisite piano piece filled the air in my apartment, blending with the aromatic fragrance of sizzling bacon and brewing coffee. My fingers moved automatically, flipping pancakes with mechanical precision. The mountain air outside was crisp, and the sunlight filtered through the tall pines, casting a warm glow on the rustic furnishings of my secluded retreat. Draec had told me of Feyre's visit to the Blackout along with her mate and the shadowsinger. The Mother only knew what I would do with that. But this was something I would mull over later, preferably with a bottle of wine. Or maybe three.

My solitude was shattered by an unexpected knock on the door. Lana, I assumed, no doubt to check on my wounds and for free breakfast. My steps were confident, fueled by the rhythm of the music that echoed my determination to keep my mind at bay. However, as the door swung open, my eyes widened with surprise at the unexpected visitors.

"Well, look who's living the mountain hermit life. We had to fly through half the forest to find you."

Nesta Archeron stood at my doorstep along with her mate, the General. What the hell were they doing here? I couldn't mask my astonishment, and Nesta already wore a scowl. The Illyrian hovered awkwardly behind her, a sheepish grin on his face. I frowned, these wards sucked.

I plastered a smile on my face and said in a flat voice, "Hello Nesta."

Nesta brushed past me, entering my sanctuary without invitation. Her mate mumbled something about waiting outside and quickly retreated, leaving me alone with the tempest that was my sister. Oh, goody.

I closed the door, turning to face her. "How did you find me?"

Nesta, undeterred by my icy reception, replied, "Locator spell. Cassian was idle enough to fly me here. Convenient, huh?"

I suppressed a scowl, gesturing towards the couch. "Fine. I'm guessing you didn't hunt me down for nothing. Let's talk."

We settled on the plush cushions, and the tension in the room thickened. Nesta wasted no time in cutting to the heart of the matter. "Why did you hide all this from us?"

I stayed silent, searching for the right words to say if I dared to speak the truth. Nesta leaned closer, eyes never leaving my face. Young, I felt so young, it felt like I was back in that cottage, back being that scared little girl. I closed my eyes. It's okay, I can do this. I fought a Basisilisk for Cauldron's sake. What's holding a conversation with Nesta? Well, realistically speaking, a gazillion times more terrifying.

I said smoothly, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. But I had to."

She cocked her head, gold-brown hair sliding over her shoulder. On anyone else, the movement would have been contemplative. On her, it was the warning of a predator circling its prey. Her eyes flared, "Enough with the vague excuses. I want the truth. How did this happen? How did you become Morana Alarie? How did you become Fae?"

I hesitated, my gaze flickering to the window overlooking the towering mountains. "There are things you don't understand, Nesta. Things you can't understand."

She leaned forward, her eyes narrowing. "Try me."

A firestorm of emotions raged within me, threatening to erupt. "I can't, alright?" Nesta's fingers curled into fists in her lap. But she said nothing.

I ploughed ahead, "I know what you must think of me. I know I was in the wrong for lying to you. But you just have to trust me."

Nesta looked me over and demanded. "How is that possible when I don't even know who you are?"

I mumbled, "I am still your sister. I am sorry for not being there but I am still family." I didn't even know who I was talking to. Nesta or myself. Was I truly their family if all I had ever done was lie? If our blood spoke a different language? If all we shared was one last name. A name that wasn't mine to have in the first place. I looked into Nesta's eyes. And despite the cold calculation, a faint glimmer of worry shown there. I tried not to think of how rare it was or what it meant.