LOVELORN

35|Insecurities & shock

It was obvious that Mai wanted to know what happened, she kept giving me looks with that clear message. I eventually mouthed 'later' to her and she stopped with her antics, satisfied with my answer or at least respectful of it.

I needed to use the bathroom and I told Harper as much. After doing my business and washing my hands, I opened the door and immediately halted in my steps. The kitchen was close to the bathroom and I could hear two people talking in there. I recognized the voices as Lex and Caio.

Lex asked something, but I only heard the end part of it. "...not single?"

"It's complicated, but no, not really. My friends don't know, so please don't say anything. He's not out."

This was the second time I listening in on Caio's conversation with someone and I started to feel a bit bad for overhearing his private talks. But they would notice me if I went past the kitchen, so I stayed put. Maybe I should inform him that I knew he had a thing with a guy, but then I'd have to admit I'd ended up eavesdropping on him twice. By accident, albeit.

"Don't worry, I won't. Sorry for hitting on you, by the way."

"It's cool, you didn't know."

When they returned to the living room, I stayed back for a minute, then also headed there. I was seriously conflicted on whether to confront him about what I'd heard or not. On one hand, perhaps it was best he told us himself. On the other hand, I didn't like hiding what I knew from him. It wasn't like I knew exactly who it was, but I suspected it was someone from Avi's friend group who had been present when we saw them at that café after ice skating weeks prior, but that was all I knew. It did narrow down the options, but Avi also had a lot of friends. It's his story to tell, I reminded myself.

I hadn't expected the tension in the living room that had arisen in the minutes I was gone. Silas seemed frustrated while the guy of the couple who'd been making out looked cocky. Mara and the girl were clearly uncomfortable. It became apparent what was going on when I heard the words Silas spat out.

"Why does our sex life matter so much to you, anyway? Mind your business, Jack."

Jack, right, that was his name.

He smirked as if he found it amusing to get on Silas' nerves. "Chill, man. I just find it hard to believe that you haven't had sex in all that time together. Not even a saint of a man can hold out for that long. You mean to tell me you haven't been looking for other sources of some fun in all that time, if you know what I mean."

"Jack, you're being a jerk," the girl whisper-yelled, inching away from him.

Silas' eyes narrowed. "It's that unbelievable that a relationship can be about more than just physical stuff? That says more about you than me if anything."

"I'm not saying it's only physical. What I'm saying is, are you really in a serious relationship if you haven't even gotten a handjob from your girlfriend? We're not in middle school anymore. Holding hands and a peck on the cheek isn't enough to satisfy anybody's needs anymore. I'm being realistic here, not a jerk."

Silas scoffed. "I don't think you're the ultimate relationship judge here considering your previous ones."

"The fuck is that supposed to mean?"