HOLD ME AGAIN

Chapter 2

Hi guys!
The chapters mostly will be Rayne p.o.v
Have a nice day!

Do you ever get the feeling when you are sitting in your room alone your thoughts wander. You are not crying but you just feel sad and empty replaying moments from your life and wondering where did it all go wrong. I guess that what life is. Messes with us every now and then. I'm trying, I'm trying really hard but I can't pretend it doesn't hurt when it really does. I really want to tell someone about the things going on in my head but truth is everyone else is busy with someone else.  I'm nobody's priority and I don't want to bother any one with meaningless problem that they don't need to hear. Every night I cry myself to sleep. I need someone to hug and tell me everything is going to be okay but no, everyone seem not to care. Am I really invisible?
Family means the world to me but everyday they break me. Everyone makes it clear to me that I'm a burden, even my own husband thinks low of me. I still remember what he said to me.
" listen little wretch, you are just a mistake. I have no love and respect for you... I don't think I ever will . I love someone else. She's my world. I love her so much and it's killing me being far from her. This marriage is nothing to me more than a deal. A fucking business deal.If my dad hadn't threatened me of my lineage I wouldn't have spared a look at a girl like you. I can never have a boring awkward loser as my wife. You are just a pathetic and unwatched bitch. I can't believe I'll be living with you. "

Those words are still fresh registered in my mind and each time I recall it fills tears in my eyes.
He had no idea his every word broke my heart.
That how I've been feeling for the last two months.
Reckless
I know marriage is meant to keep people together not just when feelings are good but particularly when they're not. Isn't that the reason we take marriage vows?.
What is love? Caring for someone regardless to what others think......
" Ma'am... ma'am are you listening?" Katherine said. Our housemaid and my only friend. She's a nice woman in her fifties  working for the li contis for almost thirty years now so basically he watched Leonardo grow up. It funny how we became close. She had almost break my limbs thinking I Was One of Leo's bed warmer trying to sneak in the house. I remember when she created a ruckus in order to protect my feelings in front of Freya.
"Rayne, I said sir wants to speak to you." I was dreading
He wants to speak to me. Does he feel guilty for what he did and said. Does he miss me the way I do but mostly why does he want to speak to me?!
I mentally screamed at myself for having thoughts of him missing me. It was like asking for the impossible.
"Okay..." was all I said. I walk out of the room and towards Leo's office. I hear voices coming from inside without thinking I open the door and see all his guard all over the room and in the middle stood Leo, everyone's head turns to me. Suddenly I felt so
self- conscious.
" meeting dismissed" he then announce keeping his glare on me. The guards immediately dispersed.
"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE!!?" he screamed at me as his face goes red and his hands clenched to a fist.
"I... I didn't mean to interrupt..." I stuttered finding it hard to talk.
"Leonardo, I-"
"Just shut up!its Mr Leonard li Conti for you."he said almost disgust by me. He walks towards me while I took a step back. It felt like a predator hunting it prey. My body trembled and shook with floods of fear and terror. I was scared if I said anything it will make him more angry. He look at me and says.
"Get ready we are visiting your parents for dinner, you can leave now." I nod and walks to the door but he quickly stops me "wait" I turn around.
"Wear something fancy, I don't want someone like you sitting with me like that." I nod, a bit hurt by what he said.

A few hours later......
"Just a second Katherine!! I will be there!" I screamed inside the bathroom as I gave my makeup it's final touches.
I was wearing a spaghetti strap V-neckline with a beading and embroidery which show my cleavages and hugged my curves
I felt beautiful wearing it but it was too much for my liking. It was too exposing. My hair was tied in a bun. As I look at my reflection my eyes were more of a green colour than Hazel and I can't question anyone about that. With one final look, I walked out of the room towards the main door to be met with a cold look from my husband. He was looking perfect so hot- I mean you know...
For a second, I forgot that I was gawking at him.
"This will not do." he shook his head in a no and looked displeasingly at me.
"Go put some makeup on." his words surprised me.
"Huh?"
"I don't like repeating myself Miss Collins" he moved closer to me and I couldn't look his eyes anymore. The eyes which display how much he loathes me.
"Nevermind you can never be beautiful no matter how much makeup you put on,I pity you my unwanted bride." and he walked away with me following behind.
Tears threatened to fall but I couldn't show it he doesn't care and never will he.
I wondered, my reflection said otherwise.
Does a mirror lie????
When I smiled it smile and when I cry it cry.
We walk to the black limousine waiting for us. As soon as we both are seated the car starts and we both are blanketed in an awfully awkward silence. He was busy with his phone while I stared at the tinted window as if it was the most interesting thing.
The stopping of the vehicle awakens me from my reverie and I straighten up to get out of the car. Both my parents were waiting for us including Freya. They all welcomed my husband and Never glanced my way not even how are you was asked!
Freya was glued to Leonardo and my parent were like nothing was happening. They all walked inside completely ignoring me. I fell like just lingering behind.......fading away and wanting to flee to a place where my cries would finally be heard and my heart...... My heart would stop hurting.
Wave of laughter echoed in the air.
Quietly, I walked in and sat down. I began listening to the conversation. I felt so..... excluded not that I wasn't used to it but it made the situation worse making me feel so alone. No one wanted or should I say I had no one here yet I was staying trying so hard to fit.
"So,Leonardo, Freya will be attending the party tonight...." Isabelle teased, making me feel like sinking into my seat. I glance at Leo, a silent whimper echoed in my heart as I notice a small smirk grace his face. He didn't mind his own wife was sitting there while her family tried to set him up with her sister in law.
But that wasn't new to me, he made it clear I can never be his wife and I saw it myself making out with Freya on our wedding night. I couldn't take it

I had to get away. I can't take it anymore.

Quietly pushing back my seat, I got up and excused myself. I winced as I tumble down to hit the floor. Using my other hand to break my fall I had take a hold on the table to support me but me being unlucky the table clothe and all the glasses, food came crashing on me. The coldness of the drink and hotness of the food added pain which led me to shriek loudly.
I could feel everyone disgustful gaze as I sat on my knees in shock. I turn to Freya to see her with one of her usual smirk. She did it. She made me so humiliated. I felt like crying.
"Did you make me fall on purpose?" I looked at her, slowly gathering myself I got up with no one coming to my assistance.
"No. I did not" she lied. She was lying in front of everyone.
"Why are you ly-"
"Enough!" I heard a roaring sound which came from dad.
"Why would Freya do that. You are not worth her time. You think she is jealous or you're beautiful. You are nothing but a piece of trash. A mistake to this family! Get lost!!" he truly despised me. I had been such a disappointment, a mistake as they say.
I turn to Leo but he just looked at me with no emotion. He was just unaffected. Deciding to just go with the little bit of dignity left. I began speed walking to my room not caring as anxious tears began pouring down my cheeks.
Upon reaching my room. I quickly stepped inside, closed the door and collapsed down on the floor. The door of my room was slammed open.
"Little slut!" it was Isabelle her glare still fierce. You wondering how come a mother can be so cruel to her child? Well that how I was. Some questions don't have their answers.
"What did you think, you are married to a billionaire so you can break any damn thing you want, huh!" she slapped me so hard am sure the mark will be visible soon.
"Next time you step in my house, you should know who the boss is. What do you think, you whoring around like a desperate bitch can pay the damage you've done!" she pulled my hair hard as I cried silently.
"Am sorry mom, Fre-" I tried to speak but she didn't let me. In fact pulled my hair harder.
"Shut up.... Don't you dare accuse Freya of something she can never do. You are being a fibber. How could you think of taking Freya's man? Leonardo is meant to be Freya's not ugly whore like you!!" she pushed me away with force as I slammed my head against the bed headboard and with that she left.
It took two min before I locked the door and rushed to the bathroom. I look at myself in the mirror my makeup is ruined, my cheek has finger mark from the slap it surely stings and my once beautiful dress looks worse. Seeing that I broke down into sobs and tears. I collapsed down and cried with only one question in my mind ;

Why am I such a burden on everyone??