I adored you Madly, Extravagantly, Absurdly.

Chapter 27

Why did this take so long, you ask? Because writing smut always takes me longer than writing the gut-wrenching shit.
Is it considered spoiling when I say the next few chapters will be slow to be released for exactly that reason?

So what do we have this chapter? You may guess it from the title.
Smut. Times two. (And a bit of hinted but not terrible en-detail described masturbation.)
We've been waiting.
If you want to skip (and shorten the chapter for about 5000 words), I'd suggest just skipping the entire end part. Like, you'll notice when it starts and then just read the last four lines for a quick summary.
Also, the French translation are in the notes as always, but they're not terrible hard to figure out while reading.

***

"Nature has formed us for each other; why withstand her?" Teleny 107-108

France is awful.

How can a backwards country like this produce such angels as Sirius and Regulus?

Paris is like London stuck in a carnival nightmare. Everyone is dressed far more extravagantly than necessary with pearls, paint and silly hats.

Also, no one in this bloody city speaks English. It is probably all the snails they eat. They soften their brains. Whatever it is, Remus is exhausted. He has been in this city for a few hours and is already done with the entire country and its people. Their armies should have tried harder.

For the past ten minutes, he has been trying to get the clerk in Sirius's building to tell him how to get to his flat.

The building is placed in a row of houses in one of the wealthy Parisian districts. There are a number of flats in it, managed by a mean-looking, aloof Frenchman who refuses to look straight at him.

"Just tell me where I need to go," he says to the clerk.

The man says something in French that is barely even directed at him.

"Come on. Does no one in this god-forsaken country speak English? Sirius Black. I need to go to his flat. Tell me how to get there."

"L'audace de l'anglais," the man says with a pointed laugh and turns to a hallboy. "Pouvez-vous croire ce type? Les touristes."

The hallboy laughs as well. Remus wants to smash their heads together.

"Sirius. Black," Remus repeats slowly. He takes out the note with the addresses and points at the one of the Parisian flat. "I want to go to his flat."

"Je ne vous dirai rien, espèce de barbare."

Remus hits the top of the counter with his fist. "I know he lives here! Sirius. Black." He steals a pencil and writes the name down. "Rue de... whatever. Here. Sirius Black. Where? Call him. Call. Sirius Black."

People coming and going stop and look at the scene. The clerk notices their audience, too. "Calme-toi ou je te fais expulser par la sécurité."

Remus understands the word "security" but ignores it. He won't leave this place until they brought him to Sirius.

"Sirius. Black." When the clerk won't budge. Remus looks around the hall and raises his voice. "Does any of you speak English? This man is incapable of doing his job! Incapable clerks all around this place. What a shame to live here."

The clerk shushes him and apologises to the room. "Are you insane?" the man asks, suddenly master of the English language. He speaks with a heavy accent, but at least he seems to understand Remus. "Be quiet."

"Sirius Black. Just let me know how to get to him. He is a friend of mine, and the situation is dire."

The clerk rolls his eyes. "Friend? Monsieur Black does not leev 'ere anymore. Not for weeks. Shouldn't you know zat as a friend?"