Fifth Avenue

Out of Touch

Ray leaned against the table Egon was working at and swallowed a sip of coffee. 

"So you're telling me that instead of asking her out.. You offered her a job?" 

"Yes." 

"Can we ask why?" 

"Well I-" 

"Hold on a minute, as the resident ladies man I think that this is a fabulous idea!" Peter chimed in. 

"You do?" Ray and Egon said unison. 

"Yeah! Think about it, he asks her on a date, that's one and done unless by some miracle she agrees to another one. If she works here, he gets to see her regularly, simply by going to work. He doesn't have to put himself out on a limb or be vulnerable at all. It's the perfect loophole."

 "So.. cowardice?" Winstons said. 

"Yeah that's the word, cowardice!" 

Egon sighed and buried his head in his hands. 

"I don't think that helped Pete." 

"What are you down about Spengs? You just invented the dating tactic of the century!" said Peter 

"...I wanted to ask her out but I just couldn't...My mind kept flashing to all the horrible possibilities." 

"Like what? She says no?" Winston asked. 

"Rejection would be the best out of the possibilities I thought of. For example, what if she said yes and it went horribly wrong. Or worse... what if it went well." 

"You're nervous the date would go well? Egon, are you allergic to success with women?" Peter cried. 

"If it went well there would be a possibility that we would start dating. If we start dating, it's only a matter of time before it goes South. I'm- well I'm me. I'm not good at this sort of thing, emotions, relationships.. and women have let me know that. I'd hurt her in some way, maybe I'd say something insensitive, maybe my dedication to my work would make her feel neglected."

 "He's got a point," Peter whispered. 

"Or maybe she would just start to grow tired and annoyed of me and my idiosyncrasies. The possibilities are nearly endless and a majority of them end in us not speaking to each other. I don't want that. I would rather stay as colleagues." 

"It sounds like you've put a lot of thought into this." Peter said 

"It's bold of you to assume you'll be able to stay colleagues if she works here. The more you're around her the closer you're going to get." Ray said. 

"I'll.. cross that bridge when I get to it." 

The others scoffed. "Well this sounds like an amazing plan! I take back the part about you putting thought into this." said Peter sarcastically. 

"Egon, Y/n is a great girl, you get a long great. It seems like.. She gets you. Don't you want to risk it? 'It's better to have loved and lost' and all that." said Winston calmly. 

"What is with you and the idioms lately," laughed Peter. 

"I just don't think I'm meant for them. Relationships I mean. My feelings are silly and will pass and when they do,I would rather still be able to remain colleagues." 

"I just think you're underestimating Y/n." said Ray. 

"And perhaps overestimating your own self control. It seems like a dangerous game, Egon." said Winston.

 "Maybe... but it's a chance I'm willing to take." 

The alarm sounded from downstairs. "We got this one," Ray and Winston said, rushing downstairs.

 Peter put his hand on Egon's shoulder. "You got this, buddy." he said, walking away. 

Egon glanced at the phone then sighed again. He picked up the phone and began to dial your number. "Hello? Y/n it's Egon, I was just calling to talk about the job."