Delicate

Chapter 84

HAVEN MCQUEEN
May 2022

"Okay, babies, we're leaving!" I call out, hearing my voice echo back to me in the entryway. "You're going to stay here all alone! Bye!"

"No, Mummy!" Jack comes running from around the corner, giving up the fight before his sister, as always.

"Okay, let's go, then," I pick him up and let Harry go searching for the monster with ringlets while I take Jack to the car.

We're both already buckled in our seats by the time Harry comes out with a screaming, crying, flailing Lily. I brace myself and the headache I already have as he puts her in her carseat, but that doesn't stop her from kicking her legs and practically growling between sobs. I swear to God, she's possessed.

"Hey!" I turn back to point at her as she tries to reach over and hit Jack for no apparent reason. He's not even saying anything. "Do not hit him and stop screaming. You're out of control."

"No! No! No! No!"

"Haven–"

"I need a minute," I unbuckle my seatbelt and practically kick my door open just to get out of the confined space with her screeching. It's either take a lap or scream back at her and I promised myself I would never do the latter unless she was in physical danger.

I know that we need to get going to make it on time for Harry to soundcheck, so I meant it when I said I only need a minute, but now he's out of the car and coming to meet me outside our front door. He has a small, somewhat amused smile on his face, but it's mostly a sympathetic look that he's giving me.

"I don't know what to do with her anymore, H," I shake my head. "There's something wrong with her."

He laughs even though I'm serious. I'm serious about it right now, at least. "She's just looking for attention, Hay."

"I know, but she can't just reach out and hit Jack for no reason," I throw my arm out to gesture to the car. "And I don't know what the fuck to do anymore or what tactic to use! I try to be compassionate and ask her nicely to calm down and that doesn't work, so I threaten to put her in time out and that doesn't work. She's just out of fucking control."

More seriously, he nods and gently places his hands on either side of my neck. The metal of his rings is cool and welcoming against my skin in the humid weather and my angst is only making me feel hotter.

"She'll get her energy out when we're sound checking," he reminds me. "Just let her run around and maybe she'll pass out. If we're lucky."

I offer a barely-there defeated smile in return, but my heart's not in it at all. "Alright, well we should go."

He kisses my forehead first, then leads the way back to the car to open my door for me. I climb in and refrain from looking back at Lily for the time being since she isn't crying anymore. I'm afraid that if I give her any attention, she'll be reminded that she was upset and she'll start up again. For now, she's singing along to George Harrisons' Let It Roll as Harry plays it on the car stereo. She doesn't know all the words, but she's trying.

As for myself, I close my eyes and try to meditate on the drive to the venue for Harry's One Night Only show here in London. The kids and I missed the one in New York only because the dates of the two were so close together that it really just didn't make sense to pack everything up and go to New York just to fly right back to the UK. If it was just me, I would have gone in a heartbeat, but Harry agreed that it was a lot for the kids when we could just come to the London show instead.

"Jesus," Harry mumbles about a half hour later.

I open my eyes to see what he's referring to and I'm assuming it's the seemingly never-ending line of his fans outside O2 Academy Brixton. They'll be waiting there for another four hours but I'll be willing to bet at least half of them have been waiting here since the show was announced. They're dedicated, to say the least.