Misconduct

twenty two | hate

To my sheer fucking disappointment, that flash of golden hair wasn't Nova. Instead, it was Carter's Mom and her almost platinum bob.

Great.

"Hm," I shake my head and turn my attention back to Ciara and Jonas. "No, I'm not injured. Why?"

Her mouth hangs open slightly in disbelief as she exchanges a look with Jo. He states at me with the same curiosity and freaked-out face.

"That! That's exactly what I mean. You keep cricking your neck and leaning back like a damn mad man!"

"You haven't got a spine injury, have you? Because that would really suck ass for the team." JJ adds like the unhelpful asshole he is.

I roll my eyes at the and wave them off, knocking back the last 3rd of my beer. "I'm fine. Don't worry about it."

"Logan." Ciara starts to scold me like she does her 2 year old son. "You're not ill, you're not injured. I know that's only your 2nd drink of the night and I'm assuming your not on drugs?"

"Obviously fucking not, Ci." I huff, this conversation truly starting to suck the fucking life out of me.

Is getting a little time and space to hunt down that evil spawn of a Blonde too much for a guy to ask for around here?

"Then what's wrong with you?"

Just as I'm about to offer her some bullshit excuse, my phone buzzes from inside my pants pocket.

It's embarrassing how quickly I reach for it, how disinterested I am in anything apart from a potential message from Nova.

11:25 PM

Goldilocks☀️: ticktock Logan
Goldilocks☀️: you're not very good at this game, are you? 

"Ohhhhhh." Jonas sings from over my shoulder, his face hanging above my phone screen. "Now this makes a whole lot of sense."

"Shut the fuck up." I grit out under my breath.

Jo shrugs with a sly smirk on his face. "Keep talking to me like that and I won't help you."

My scowl falls and I'm beyond grateful that Ciara is distracted by a group of guests to notice our conversation.

"You know where she is?"

"I might." He shrugs, an evil twinkle in his eye. "What's it worth to you?"

I know exactly what he's trying to do. He's trying to goad an answer out of me, to get me to spill my guts out. For me to disclose every nitty, gritty, complicated detail of my twisted relationship with Nova.

But if there's one thing I value, it's my fucking privacy.

I won't be manipulated into giving that up. Besides, what am I supposed to say to him?

That November and I have this undeniable, unbearable tension. That I can't even stand to be in the same room as her without my fingers itching to reach out and touch her. That every fucking second I spend in her presence, I'm fighting for my damn life. Fighting to keep my head above water.

That it's exhausting and confusing as fuck but also exhilarating and fascinating.

I don't fucking think so, buddy.

"I haven't seen her since Christmas Eve." I tell him with a nonchalant shrug. At least it's part of the truth. "I just want to say hi. Check on her, I mean, check on the apartment..."

JJ is the most emotionally intelligent person I have ever met. He's not the kind of guy you can pull wool over the eyes of. Therefore, I know damn well he doesn't fully believe my bullshit excuse.