4. Do I?

79 8 1
                                    

Can this day get any fucking worse? I mean I just woke up and I do not even think I got much sleep due to my dad being up all hours of the night

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

Can this day get any fucking worse? I mean I just woke up and I do not even think I got much sleep due to my dad being up all hours of the night. How he still holds a job is beyond me. I just wish for one damn day that could go well. Waking up this morning to see my dad drinking did not help. Maybe he never stopped since last night, but then again, he would be passed out by now if he did.

"We need to hurry up and get to the Whitaker-Reynolds house." My dad slurs as he tries to get up. I go to his side and like always help him up.

"Drink some coffee first. We do not need them to know you are fucking wasted."

"I'm not."

I slam my fist down on the table, so fed up with this shit.

"Bullshit dad! It's been eleven fucking years and yet you can't get over it and move on."

"Because she was it for me!" He yells and I see the tears forming in his eyes. "It's my fault."

I shake my head because now that I'm older I understand what he had to do.

"No, it was his fault. He did this to us." I just want to punch something, but I can't. "C'mon before we are late." My eyes blink rapidly willing the tears that threaten to fall to go away. I cannot break down, because who will take care of two broken people? I sigh as I put the coffee in a to go cup as I usher my dad out the door and into my car.

On the way I see my dad take a drink out of a flask. I smack it out of his hand once he closes the lid tight. I do not want my car smelling like that shit. He is the reason why I will never drink. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" I grip the steering wheel tighter to the point my knuckles turn ghostly white. "You'll understand once you lose him. We are always losing the ones we love." Well, no shit. I lost my father the day mom died. But sometimes there is glimmer of hope, and I see the old him come back to life.

Wait! Lose him...the one I love?

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Brayden." He breathes out and I grind my teeth so hard I feel like they are going to crack.

"Nothing is going to happen to Bray."

Over my dead body something will happen to him.

"He'll leave." He rambles on and I can't take it anymore as I slam on the brakes. Thank God we are here, or I might have crashed into a pole or something.

"Like I lost you! Every damn time you get like this and spin out of control. I lose you a little more each fucking time." I jump out of the car and slam the door hard. Shocking myself that it doesn't break off the hinges. "Adam." I can hear the pain in his voice, but can't he hear mine too? "I don't want to fucking hear it dad. I'm done!" I storm up to the house not even caring if he falls flat on his face. Does that make me a bad son? I just don't care right now.

Change Of HeartWhere stories live. Discover now