Lies and Damnation

Epilogue

Epilogue:

After crying against the steering wheel for a long time, Nicholas straightened, furiously wiped off his tears, and pretended none of this happened.

He drove home. He told himself Milo's mental state was not his responsibility, so he didn't need to care. There was no reason to feel bad. He'd never see him again, anyway.

Nicholas saw Milo again the following week.

He'd driven right back there.

Milo yelled at him and slammed the door in his face again.

Nicholas went back home.

This time for real, Nicholas thought. This isn't my problem. Why do I even care? I'm not going back.

He went back.

Milo shouted at him to piss off and never show up again. He said that he still hated him and he still didn't want to see his face.

Nicholas returned home. He sat on the couch, leaning his head back, frowning at the ceiling. The room was quiet. There wasn't Valentino to fight with, or Albert to talk to, or Milo to laugh with. Just silence. Just Nicholas. Alone. And it was a good thing. Valentino and Albert's absence was a good thing, but Nicholas realized he might have accidentally gotten used to other people's presence, to the idea of having someone around.

Nicholas grimaced. 

Blegh. Gross.

So cringe…

God, he needed to go back to liking solitude.

The next Saturday, Nicholas woke up, got ready, and drove to Milo's place. This time Milo's room was locked and he refused to let Nicholas in. Nicholas stood outside the door for a long while, talking to Milo about random stuff. He asked him about school. He asked him if he kept the new aloe vera pot he'd bought them again. No, Milo hadn't. He'd thrown that one too. Nicholas told him he was buying another one.

And it went on.

Nicholas wouldn't give up, no matter what Milo said. No matter how many times he kicked him out. He kept going. Sometimes, after his ears stopped ringing from the hatred in Milo's voice and the thud of the slamming door, he'd stop and wonder why he was trying so hard. What did he want from Milo? Did he really care about him, or was he just desperate for Milo to admit that he didn't hate him? To release him from the blame?

Another four months passed.

Nicholas visited tirelessly every weekend, and it paid off.

Milo's reactions gradually mellowed out.

At some point, he stopped shouting and crying every time he saw Nicholas's face. He'd just calmly say, "Go away. I still hate you." Then, "Go away." Then, no words at all. He didn't kick him out anymore. He wouldn't talk to him either, just ignoring him instead. Pretending he didn't exist. Nicholas ignored him, too. He would chill in Milo's room while Milo spent his time in bed or getting schoolwork done.

Once, Milo glanced back at Nicholas with an uncertain frown as he sat in his room. Nicholas waved. Milo shook his head and sighed, turning away again.

"When are you gonna get tired of this?" Milo asked with a defeated, tired voice.

"I won't."

Four more months passed.

Milo was getting better. He didn't throw the aloe vera pot anymore; he left it on his nightstand now. He chatted a little with Nicholas every time he came over. Nicholas couldn't have been more relieved, and he found himself more energetic now that Milo stopped treating him like an enemy.