I HEAR YOU

II: SOFIA

I thought I heard my name when I retreated back to my classroom not wanting to wait for the bell to ring. Well... My name's not unique anyway, so it could not only be me.

I opened my bag to get a packed snack mom made for me for recess and looked at the swarms of students playing outside. Some students in the sixth grade are on the ground laughing and talking. Some of them are showing off new phones.

What could they be talking about? I thought.
I stared at them jealously. I was supposed to be in sixth grade and it's hard to find friends when you land on a different grade, a new school and a new town in the middle of the year.

"Hey!," my thoughts were cut off by a girl smiling at me who seats in front of me. She seems nice. "Sofia right?," she asked and I just nodded and returned a polite smile at her. "Come join me outside," she didn't ask me. She invited me smiling excitedly and expectantly and I just stared at her not really wanting to explain why I couldn't join her but I couldn't just ignore her because that would be too rude.
"Thank you but no thank you," I say in my most polite tone just as how my Granna taught me how. I smiled at her genuinely, because I was really happy when she talked to me. I thought they'd just ignore me.

"Oh, it's okay," she gave me a sad smile and a slight nod before she headed out the door. I followed her retreating image and my eyes landed on the group of friends waiting for her. They were talking and laughing and once again my mind drifted to things I could be doing but not be able to do. I wished so hard in my mind but I know there's no shooting star for a wish like mine. I just stared at them longingly like they were old friends. If only friendships are the only thing that drifts in life, I wouldn't be here.

A small beep blew my bubbling thoughts away. I looked around. Miss Rosario deep in sleep on her desk and students still waiting for the bell to ring. So I carefully grabbed a purple pouch inside my bag.

I slid the pouch inside again after doing business with it and my mind suddenly praised our silent transaction earlier. 'Pleasure doing business with you'. My mind says to the pouch just then the bell rang.

The streets are too silent here. But. The silence here is peaceful. This is far too different from where I came from. Granna always had a hard time to make me cross the street because I fear the vehicles rushing to get across.

The dried leaves cry under my steps in my walk to the house. The breeze is soft against my skin. The leaves on the trees dance at the soft blowing breeze.

I basked in the little sunlight that seeps through the leaves above me. Dad was right. This is perfect. Not too much, just enough. He'd always say on the phone about how the trees seem to dance and the leaves whistle while you walk. He'd say I'd love it here. And he was right. I love it already the moment I stepped out of the pump boat. I fell in love with it more when I played by the beach though I received an earful, it was worth it.

I started walking slowly because I really don't like this walk to end. I wanted it to last longer. Now I'm anoyed at the 10 minute walking distance from my house to school. My steps faltered at the sight of an old Hispanic House. Dad told me I'd love this house and its owner though I haven't really met him......or her? I do not have the slightest idea where this classic beauty belongs.

I was admiring the house when I saw a mango tree which branches extended to....... our house! I got excited at the sight and at the thought of climbing through my window. Mom will go hysterical but this will be history. I'm grinning now. If anyone could see me, they would think I've lost it. The sound of the ocean broke my devious thoughts.

The house looked abandoned but not spooky at all. If the owner's still alive he or she may have found it hard to keep the house as it was. It looks too big to manage when you are alone. I walked nearer to the gates and peeked. I saw pots. Pots! A lot of them! I squealed not really minding if anyone could see me. I just couldn't contain my excitement. I missed gardening. Way back in the city, I only managed to keep about five hanging plants that hangs right before the windows of my room. I've learned that planting makes my life a little less boring. I wasn't really allowed to have a full-blown garden back there.

As I retreated back to the sidewalk and go straight to the house, the thoughts of plants I plan to grow floods in my minds. I can already picture my smile when I wake up.

The red painted rusty iron gates creaked as I pushed it on my way to the house. I would have to remind Dad to put oil on those hinges. It just irritates my ears. When I saw the slippers, I sighed. I just wished she had already forgotten what I did yesterday. Why does moms really have to bury their child's mistakes and dig it back again? I sighed again as I sit on my study desk beside my windows.

I can hear the ocean. I sigh again, but this time dreamily. I could hear the waves and I swear I could even see it as it rushes towards the shore. The sight of clear waters and white sand rushes in my mind even if I could not see it. The sound seems to be images in my mind.
"I know that look," a voice invaded my dreamland. I turned around to see Mom trying to put on her shoes with her right hand and the other trying to button her blouse up. I chuckled at the sight. She must be in a hurry. When she heard me, she gave me a look that shut me up. I turned my gaze outside again but not erasing the smile on my face. "Sofie baby......Please," Mom's voice sounded strained and pained and I lost the smile I had but I didn't face her. I don't want her to see my sad smile again when she looks at me with pleading eyes.

Mom must have realized my silence when she changed the subject. "You're early," her tone light and calm. I smiled. Again. I'd give anything just to see them smile and even hear them smile when they speak.

"The Filipino teacher is on a sick leave," I replied still smiling but not facing her.
"Sofie baby....," she said again. I know what she wanted to say but I know she's trying to fight her outburst again. She could easily snap and it must have taken a toll on her when she realized she have to be patient with me. I couldn't help but feel a lump in my throat again. I don't want to cry. I don't want to remind myself that I'm helpless. I swallowed the lump in my throat.

"I know mom," I faced her smiling. She stood unmoved on the doorstep of my room. I couldn't tell if she heard the strain in my voice and if she could see through my forced smile. "I won't do it again. I promise not to go to the beach without anyone with me and stay too long under the sun," I added like a student caught red-handed and forced to write in a whole sheet of paper the sentence 'I won't do it again.' She smiled. I released a breath I didn't realize I was holding. Like I said, I'd give anything to see them smile.

"I'm on my way to a parent-teacher meeting. If you get hungry I have prepared sandwiches. Your Dad and I will be late but I made some casserole just heat it up, okay?," she said. I hummed in response. "Love you sweetheart," she said kissing my forehead and rushed outside without bothering to hear me reply. I just looked at her until she was out of my sight.
I heard voices. A gate creaking. I heard laughing. I am getting curious when the laughter came from the old Hispanic house but I couldn't really see it. The solid walls of this fences forbids me to see who could be in the house next to mine. The voices seemed to fade and I figured they must have went inside the house. I looked up to see the branches the mango tree I saw earlier and smiled at my devious thoughts. I changed into a boy shorts and loose shirt and tied my hair in a bun.
I stood on my window and climbed to get to the roof. The roof has cooled enough to bear the heat it absorbed this noon. I walked carefully because this house is old and I would not want my Mom to go bananas when I break a leg or something. I coud see a sturdy part of the branch and reached for it. I slowly placed my feet and hung like a koala. I'm sweating like a never ending spring. I didn't know this was a lot of work. Dad's gonna lock me up after this and Mom's gonna make me go back again. I laughed but not too much because I am still a koala here.

I crawled backwards until my butt hit the hard trunk. I sat up. I looked around and downwards if anyone saw me and thankfully there was no one. I contemplated wether I jump to land or just crawl towards a near window. If I jump, there is a posibility that a dog will eat me up. If I crawl towards the window, there is a possibility that a shotgun will welcome me. I sighed and made the biggest mistake I did in my life. I crawled towards the windows. When I reached it, I tried to open it but it was hard, either locked or stuck. So I just sat on the branches with the windows a few inches away from me.

I was waiting a miracle.

This was a mistake. I thought to myself. This is indeed a big mistake. A big fat mistake. The windows were suddenly yanked open and a boy screamed murder when he saw me.