Long Way From Home

Chapter 16

That was just way too fucking cryptic and on the nose for comfort.

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I woke early that next day, Laddie's little snores just white noise as my thoughts plagued me. I had been with them for days now, and it was starting to worry me just how comfortable I was with it. Of course, it was like meeting your favorite group of celebrities, and getting to have a vacation with them in a cave, save them from dying, be the hero. But now, it was time to think logically.

I wasn't from here, this world, this universe. I never figured dimension hopping would even be a real thing, but it was, I guess. Laddie's questions opened my eyes last night. Sooner or later, no matter what, I would have to leave. I didn't belong here. No number of nights out, no matter how many concerts, drinks, joints, edibles, laughs, movie sessions with Laddie, or cuddle piles I had with them, it would end. Eventually. Like a dream you didn't want to end so you went back to sleep. It picked up where it left off, but now that you subconsciously know it's a dream, it lacks...something. Perhaps the facade that it was real, that it was a real reality. Now that I knew it was a dream, I felt out of place. The faces too plain, the noises and actions too generic, the plot of the dream no longer fantastical as it once was. It lost its magic with the realization it wasn't real, that it wouldn't ever be real.

Laddie snuggled closer, Paul rumbles in his sleep, arms tucked securely around Laddie's small torso, pulling the boy closer to him. Laddie doesn't seem to notice, aside from a few twitches in his leg. Once again, the moment lost its tranquility. A pang of nausea boiled hot in my stomach; my chest aching as I thought of leaving. I didn't really want to. But a dark cloud of guilt and anxiety sat heavy over me, practically suffocating me. I wanted to stay, I hated the thought of leaving them, but I also hated myself for wanting to stay. My mother needed me. She was very sick, and I was her only child, we've always been so close. How could I leave her when she needed love and support right now? Her cancer wasn't getting better, only keeping a steady rate of progression. She had months, maybe a year or two if she was lucky and didn't push herself. How could I just abandon her like that? For what? Being with a pack of vampires in an alternate dimension in which Lost Boys was not a movie but in fact reality? She's on her deathbed and her only child just suddenly disappears without a trace? She'd spend the rest of her days not knowing. How could I do that to her?

My throat tightened, and I clenched my teeth, willing myself to not get sick. Vomiting from stress and anxiety wouldn't be a good look, plus, once they see that they'll know somethings wrong and then they'll pry. Vampires didn't even need to pry, they just lifted that imaginary vail that kept your thoughts to yourself and scooped whatever they wanted or needed with a wooden ladle, took a sip and went 'Mm, of course, perfect' when they got what they wanted. So, no vomiting. We do that alone and in a public bathroom where I can cry in peace before a group of drunk girls decide to adopt me and fix my make up and tell me how wonderful I am. Never had that particular experience, but I've seen videos of it online, and it looks nice.

Marko shifted, pressing up against my back, burrowing his face into the nape of my neck, skin cool, but moderate in the chill air of the cave. The house will be better. Oh, yes, that's right. We move in today, tonight? Whatever, you know what I mean. The car was already packed up, and Laddie would ride with me while I drove. I was excited for him, how long has it been since he's slept in an actual bed? Think of all the back problems that boy might have. I leaned back into Marko, his arm slung around me, the other stretched out under my pillow, fingers tangled in Paul's hair. Glancing down at Laddie, I wondered how he'd deal when I left.

David and Dwayne would see to it that he got educated, at least to an acceptable level, though I would have preferred if he was actually home schooled-at least until the eighth grades. The boys would be fine though. They've been alive for so long; they're used to people coming and going. I wasn't a vampire, so that particular bond of blood or whatever wasn't there. Sure, we've gotten close-as close as I think I'm gunna get with them-but I wasn't pack. I didn't expect to be either. I simply wanted to live and help in the beginning. I liked Laddie, liked the pack, and I didn't want to see them die-at least in person. That would have sucked-major balls-nor would I have liked being killed by them, so it was a win-win. I didn't expect to take to their lifestyle so quickly, so easily, like I was simply breathing. It's gunna suck when I have to go.